Dear Abby: Woman laments mother-in-law from hell

Dear Abby: I need some advice regarding my motherin-law. She has hated me since the first time she met me because I’m not from the country but from “the city.” I have given her gifts for birthdays and holidays and invited her on day trips with us, but she always refuses.

She also makes up lies about me. She claims I have STDs, spend all her son’s money, etc. She even spread a rumor that I wouldn’t allow her at our wedding. She lives 46 miles away and, in the five years we have been married, has never once visited her son. I take him to visit her because he can’t get a driver’s license because of medical issues.

Our child and I aren’t even allowed in her home. We have to sit in the car. She acts like our child doesn’t exist, but she has pictures of her other two grandchildren on Facebook and drives to see them almost weekly. My husband sees nothing wrong with her behavior and says he “won’t take sides.” I don’t know what to do.

— Peeved in Pennsylvania Dear Peeved: Please accept my sympathy for your situation. While your husband refuses to recognize there is anything wrong with his mother’s behavior, it is off the charts. I hope you realize that most men stand up for their wives and children when they are mistreated.

Because you can’t change your husband or his witch of a mother, and you made no mention of leaving the marriage, you will simply have to adjust to it. Start by planning an activity you and your child can enjoy while your husband is visiting his mom, rather than sitting for hours in the car.

Even better, arrange “other” transportation for your husband.