Pilot light is out with old flame

DEAR ABBY >> I met a man, “Gabe,” 30 years ago. We had a very good time together. We dated some and even traveled occasionally. I liked him a lot but, when we met, I was divorced and looking for marriage. He was not.

I moved for my job, and met and married someone else. Gabe did call to keep in touch for several years, but the calls stopped. I never forgot him.

My husband passed away four years ago, and then COVID hit. Feeling the loneliness of lockdown, I wrote letters to people I hadn’t heard from in years. Gabe’s was one such letter. He called me after he received it, and we reconnected. We have enjoyed each other’s company off and on since then.

I would love to have a deeper relationship with him. Unfortunately, he regards me as nothing more than a friend. He is intelligent, quick-witted, well-traveled and still very handsome. I enjoy his company very much. I’ve wanted to tell him how I feel, but I don’t want to jeopardize what we have together.

So here I am, now in my 60s, feeling lost and not knowing how to handle my desire to be with him. What do you think?

— Long History in Florida

DEAR HISTORY >> If you are looking for more than you already have with Gabe, you are wasting your time. Gabe is satisfied with the relationship just as it is.

If he wasn’t, believe me, he would have mentioned it. If what you need is someone to “nest” with, you will have to look elsewhere. Sorry, he isn’t it.