Abusive husband won’t let go of wife, kids

DEAR ABBY >> Iam the mother of two small children. I have separated from their verbally abusive, alcoholic father. I returned to my grandmother, who raised me, and tried to get a job. I couldn’t find one because we went into quarantine and my uncles made me move out.

I live in a women’s shelter with my children, and I found a job. My problem is my husband still acts like we are getting back together, and he’s embarrassed that we are living here. I want a divorce, but he won’t talk about it, and threatens not to send money to support us.

He keeps telling me how much money he makes now and that he can get us a nice place where he is, or he can come stay a whole week with us when he’s off. I don’t want him to come stay with us.

When I tell him this, he gets angry and hangs up, but then calls back the next day to say the same thing. I can’t get him to understand that I don’t want to be with him anymore, and I’m tired of his abuse. (The last time I lived with him, he “accidentally” knocked our son into the couch and walked out.) He won’t admit he has a problem. Any advice?

— Done for Good

DEAR DONE >> Your husband persists the way he has been because he’s trying to wear you down to the point that you will reunite with him. Perhaps you should accept fewer of those phone calls. If there are social workers connected to the shelter you’re staying in, consult them about your predicament.

Your husband cannot shirk paying child support. If he doesn’t do it voluntarily, his wages can be garnished. While you’re at it, reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-7233) because they may have useful suggestions about how to rid yourself of your abusive, alcoholic husband.