Patriots docuseries ‘The Dynasty’ a farce
Picked-up pieces after heart surgery . . .
■ It was not my intention to return to these pages this soon, and I am far from 100 percent, but some things cannot wait. I remember ripping tubes out of my arms after sinus surgery when I got the word that the Red Sox had finally fired crusty manager John McNamara on Bastille Day in 1988. I’d been waiting three long seasons for that moment and was not about to let another Globe scribe Knife the Mac on the day the Sox made the long-overdue sacking.
Which brings us to . . . “The Dynasty,” the entertaining yet loathsome 10part Kraft hagiography/Belichick hit piece that dropped its final two episodes on Apple TV last weekend.
The Globe’s estimable Ben Volin has already given great voice to the preposterousness and unfairness of the series, but my dark, healing heart would not allow this moment to pass without joining the chorus of “Dynasty” detractors.
Bottom line: As Patriots/NFL history goes, “The Dynasty” is a farce.
It’s great to have so much locker room footage, and the Apple folks give us a lot of credible and interesting voices. Hearing Rob Gronkowski tell his truth and Tom Brady drop Fbombs is new and enlightening. Free of Big Bad Bill, Devin McCourty, Matthew Slater, Ty Law, Tedy Bruschi, Randy Moss, Willie McGinest, and Danny Amendola are worthy truth-tellers. It’s great to hear so much from Ernie Adams.
But make no mistake: This is Bob Kraft’s authorized history of the Patriots. Nothing less.
It all goes back to Jeff Benedict’s 2020 book, “The Dynasty.” Benedict is a legit journalist who wrote 16 books prior to this one. I called him in October of 2020 to express my disappointment with what I considered the one-sid
edness of this work. We had a cordial conversation and he responded formally with a short statement defending the book’s fairness. Swell. Kraft’s response to the book’s fairness was to send it out to Patriots season ticket-holders as a party favor.
Benedict worked with Apple as a producer and is credited as the writer of the series. He has emerged as commander-in-chief of the Patriots media cartel and certainly qualifies to be a ceremonial lighthouse bell-ringer for a 2024 Gillette game. As Volin pointed out, the final credit of every episode reads, “Copyright Kraft Dynasty LLC 2024.”
Got that? Not the Patriot Dynasty. Not the Brady Dynasty. Certainly not the Belichick Dynasty. It’s the “Kraft Dynasty,” and don’t you forget it.
In this series, Kraft emerges as the inventor and savior of the Patriots, a benevolent owner who always tries to do the right thing and the man who held the whole thing together while Evil Bill and wonderful “Tommy” grew apart.
We see nothing of Kraft’s 1998 deal to move the team to Hartford, and don’t wait underwater for any reference to Orchids of Asia. Bob and Jonathan are the hero of every story (did you know that it was Jon who ordered Bill to get rid of Aaron Hernandez?), a father and son who somehow won despite a needy quarterback named Tommy and a petty, overrated meany coach named Belichick.
Bill Belichick is ripped by his players for his love letter to Donald Trump on the eve of the 2016 election, but there’s no mention of Kraft’s $1 million donation to the Trump inaugural fund. And did we really need Rupert Murdoch’s homage to Bob, which practically put RKK on a par with Jonas Salk?
I didn’t.
In his ceaseless effort to paint himself as a good guy, Kraft actually acknowledges that he said this to Hernandez when the tight end was accused of murdering Odin Lloyd: “I said, ‘Aaron, tell me, did you do this? Because if you did, I know you must have had some good reason. I’m going to get you the best defense lawyer we can get.’ ”
There you go. The Patriot Way. Recalling the Belichick-Brady breakup, Kraft recounts Tom and Gisele Bundchen coming to Kraft’s house and Gisele complaining, “That [expletive] Belichick, he doesn’t treat my Tommy like a man.”
The humanity!
Now that Belichick is gone, the gloves are off, and everything is Bill’s fault.
Referencing New England’s loss to the Eagles in Super Bowl LII, Kraft says, “I credited Bill with that loss.” The owner acknowledges that he ultimately chose Belichick over Brady in 2020, but we aren’t supposed to blame him for the breakup.
I also found it interesting that while the carefully Krafted “Dynasty” was being made available — and after 20 years of photo ops and press releases (much of it promoted by Kraft’s partners at WBZ-TV/CBS Boston polishing the image of how great the Patriots treat their players and how much Patriots players love playing here) — the NFL Players Association released results of a 1,706player poll that revealed that New England ranks near the bottom in overall player satisfaction regarding treatment by the club. The Patriots finished 29th of 32 and got an “F-” for treatment of players’ families. There’s nothing about that in “The Dynasty.”
Ownership has its privileges. Drew Bledsoe, Bill Parcells, Tommy Brady, and Bill Belichick are all gone. Now we just have the Krafts and a 4-13 team starting over. Bob gets to keep campaigning for a gold jacket in Canton (Ohio), and Jonathan gets to be the invisible general manager with all the power and none of the accountability.
Let’s see how they do on their own, free of all the Hall of Fame bums they broomed out of here.
■ Quiz: Name the five Red Sox pitchers to have 20-win seasons in this century (answer below).
■ The Summer Olympics in Paris are still months away, but I already have my favorite factoid of the upcoming Games: One of the swimming venues will be the Georges Vallerey pool, which is where American Johnny Weissmuller won gold in the 1924 Olympics. Weissmuller, of course, is best known as Tarzan, a celluloid hero of Baby Boomers.
■ When the weird story surfaced that Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is considering Aaron Rodgers for his running mate, CNN reporter Pamela Brown relayed a kooky conversation she’d had with Rodgers at a long-ago Kentucky Derby party when Rodgers revealed several of his tin-foil-hat theories in a social setting.
Brown is legit. Boston sports fans should know her. Her mother was the late Phyllis George, who once was Miss America and worked NFL Sundays for CBS before marrying Celtics owner John Y. Brown, who became governor of Kentucky.
The late John Y. was the short-term Celtics owner who went behind Red Auerbach’s back and traded for Bob McAdoo in 1979. With help from Pistons coach Dick Vitale, Red turned McAdoo into Robert Parish and Kevin McHale. So if you see Pamela Brown, say, “Thanks.”
■ Kyrie Irving has no fan club here, but the redoubtable Bob Ryan says Irving’s 21-foot lefty hook/floater that was a game-winner against the Nuggets last weekend is the best off-hand shot in NBA history.
■ Here in Boston, we love Dave Roberts because of his history-changing stolen base. They love him in LA, too, even though he has done less with more than just about any manager in history.
He won the World Series in the COVID-shortened season of 2020, but has been a postseason bust in seven of eight Octobers since 2016. That includes losing to the Cubs in the 2016 NLCS, to the Astros in the 2017 World Series, to the Red Sox (remember them?) in the 2018 World Series, losing in the Division Series in 2019 despite 106 wins, losing in the NLCS in 2021 with another 106-win team, losing in the NLDS with a 111-win team in 2022 and losing to the 84-win D-Backs in the Division Series last year. Yikes.
■ Speaking of the Dodgers, MLB commissioner Rob Manfred totally deserves the bleep-show that will certainly rain on his gamblin’-lovin’ head now that we know Shohei Ohtani’s interpreter, Ippei Mizuhara, has been fired because of alleged theft “in the millions of dollars” to square illegal gambling debts.
■ All respect and credit to Kraft for his Foundation to Combat Antisemitism’s “Neighbors” ad, which was featured during the Super Bowl telecast. The ad was spectacular and the message is critical.
■ Shout-out and congrats to longtime Belichick consigliere Berj Najarian, who has landed as Bill O’Brien’s chief of staff for the Boston College football program. A Boston University grad and Wellesley resident, Najarian was the man to see for all things Belichick during the Hoodie’s 24-year reign in Foxborough.
■ Holy Cross’s women’s basketball victory Thursday over Tennessee-Martin meant the Crusaders got to play Saturday against Caitlin Clark and topseeded Iowa in Iowa City. It was a 16 seed vs. a 1 seed, but it gave the Crusaders their greatest national exposure in program history.
■ Best wishes to NBC Sports Boston’s Amina Smith, who is bound for ESPN.
■ Go to Amazon and pick up Billy Raynor’s “Why Black Men Nod At Each Other (some lessons and observations on life).” Raynor, a state champ at Catholic Memorial under coach Ronnie Perry Sr., is New England basketball royalty. He played at Dartmouth and has coached at Holy Cross, Brown, Harvard, Mass. Bay, and Framingham State.
■ RIP Paul Ryder, beloved son of Rhode Island, Stoneham, and Cambridge, who was the longtime director of recreation for the City of Cambridge and tirelessly served community youth groups for most of his 71 years. His involvement with the Cambridge Program (Helping Turn Disabilities Into Capabilities) led to the creation of the DePasquale Universal Design Playground and was perhaps the crowning achievement of his life’s work.
■ Heartfelt thanks to all who have reached out since my February surgery. You are the best readers in Boston sports history. Please know that I plan to be back full-time, but it is probably going to be a while.
■ Quiz answer: Derek Lowe (2002), Pedro Martinez (2002), Curt Schilling (2004), Josh Beckett (2007), Rick Porcello (2016).