What Mothers Deserve

How much do you love your mother?

That is not a question you have to answer to me. It is one each of us must answer to ourselves. It goes without a great deal of talk that each of us would affirm love for our mothers.

The words in today’s column could have been written a week ago, and possibly should have been. I am glad I waited until last Sunday passed. As most of us know, last Sunday, families all over the country paid tribute to mothers with the nationally recognized holiday we refer to as Mother’s Day.

I am glad I waited until the week following Mother’s Day for several reasons: The first is these days allowed me to read and hear so many warm, tender and kind expressions of love for mothers from children who have grown into adults. These expressions were gathered by way of Facebook on the Internet; some expressions were heard directly from the children and grandchildren of mothers who have passed from this life.

Then, on Sunday I heard the words that provided the motivation and foundations for words written today. Ron Mitchell, the new preacher at the Calhoun Church of Christ delivered a sermon to touch all our hearts and to challenge our attitudes and behavior toward our mothers. The sermon was titled “What Mothers Deserve.” It is possibly a play on words but note the sermon was not “what mothers want;” neither was it what mothers need. Rather, the message was one asking what mothers deserve based on their role in the lives of any of their children.

It is suspected that all of us reflect often upon times, circumstances and incidents in our mother’s lives. These reflections probably cause an evaluation of those situations and we reach back with feelings of great affection for the part our mothers made in our lives. I would like to think that those who read these words feel much as I feel and wish we could go back and adjust some of our own words and actions.

I will not discuss every expression Brother Mitchell made and displayed on the screen in his sermon. All the points are worthy of great discussion. Interspersed with these points, notice will be given to personal incidents in my life and incidents in others I have been told about or witnessed.

At this point I do want to name the points presented in the lesson: It was emphasized with many scripture references that our mothers deserve obedience, respect, affection, wisdom, righteousness and care. That we all are more attendant to some of these virtues than others is obvious.

Let me give attention to respect first. I think often of the story told by one of my assistant coaches as he related when he came home one day and in response to some instruction or comment made by his mother, he tore into her verbally with insulting and despicable language. He was happily satisfied with his handling of the situation when suddenly his father, who the boy did not know was at home and had heard it all, appeared on the upstairs landing. The thrashing the boy got probably removed any future inclination to insult his mother. What he had shown was lack of respect.

Obedience was actually the first point in the sermon heard. Most readers know my position of not holding to the idea that our time to die has been set or predetermined. I refer to the Apostle Paul’s words in Ephesians 6:12 when he said “Honor thy father and mother which is the first commandment with promise” (refer to Exodus 20:12). Verse 3 offers impact to this commandment when the writer says, “that it might be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.”

The word “that” is a word denoting consequence; a good analogy might be “eat good food, exercise and get proper sleep that you will be healthy.” Obey or honor your parents so you might live long.

Then there was the point of affection. Affection involves outward expressions of love, tenderness, kindness, warmth and regard. It is not wrong but more than proper to show all these attributes of feelings toward our mothers.

Someone suggested that we find the inspiration to tell our mother how much you love her. We don’t have to wait for Mother’s Day to come around each year. We can pick up the phone and call her. Better still, visit your mother unannounced. I remember well going to see (stopping by) my mother’s and when she would open the door, she would say, “You have made my day.” Her words always made my day.

A personal word about my mother: My mother did not have an easy life. My dad died at age 31 leaving mother with three-year-old twins and a one year old baby daughter. Mother worked hard all her life. She had help as we grew up in my Grandparent Foster’s home. Still, times were hard in 1938 and then the war years. I never lived a great distance from my mother. In fact, for the last seven years of her life we lived only one block apart. I miss her greatly. On my mantle today I have a picture of my mother and my sister, Jackie McEntyre, in their very young years. Both are gone from this life and each day I am overwhelmed with the feeling of going across the street to see Jackie’s or down the block to see mother.

My feelings are not different from so many others whose mothers have gone from life. We love and cherish them and their memories. All our mothers deserve so much from us.