THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES
‘Memory Cafe’ events an oasis for people with cognitive loss
Senior agencies seek new ways to serve those with dementia, Alzheimer’s
On most days, Jim, a tall lanky man in his late 80s, is listless and depressed and struggles to remember recent events. In the early stages of dementia, he’s often withdrawn and confused about where he is or even what day it is.
But when Jim comes to the Bellingham, Mass. Senior Center every fourth Saturday of the month to socialize with other people struggling with the same neurocognitive disorders, he becomes a different person.
Instead of being withdrawn and depressed, Jim claps his hands together and sings along as entertainer Gary Leanues belts out Dean Martin’s classic 1964 hit “Everybody Loves Somebody.”
Welcome to the Memory Café, a free monthly social program for those living with dementia and their caregivers.
“The café offers an opportunity to socialize, participate in an activity, and make new friends in an accepting environment,” says Terri Graham, the Bellingham Senior Center’s supportive day program coordinator who started the program in January.
Memory cafés have spread across the nation, including in Massachusetts and Rhode Island, and are offered everywhere from coffee shops to libraries to community senior centers. In Rhode Island, memory cafés are held in several communities, including Lincoln, East providence and Westerly.
Activities at the events include education, music, dancing and arts. They offer an opportunity for individuals with all forms of memory loss, and their care partners, to meet others with similar concerns, socialize, learn new skills and support each other as they travel their own path with dementia.
According to Graham, a certified dementia practitioner, one of the most difficult parts of advancing neurocognitive disorders, better known as dementia, is
the isolation felt by the individual with the disease and their care partner.
ementia is the loss of cognitive functioning thinking, remembering and reasoning and behavioral abilities to such an e tent that it interferes with a person’s daily life and activities. These functions include memory, language skills, visual perception, problem solving, self-management, and the ability to focus and pay attention.
ementia ranges in severity from the mildest stage, when it is just beginning to affect a person’s functioning, to the most severe stage, when the person must depend completely on others for basic activities of living.
“I’ve come across so many people with dementia, including many friends, and often times these people are depressed and withdrawn, says raham, a 1 0ount
6aint &harles Academy graduate who grew up in Bellngham. “0emory cafés are social outlets where people with memory loss and their caregivers can come together in a safe, supportive environment.
The Bellingham memory café is held every fourth 6aturday of the month from 10 to 11:30 a.m. The first half hour is typically devoted to sociali ation where participants enjoy coffee and pastry and camaraderie. The second half-hour is entertainment, usually in the form of singer ary /eanues, who has performed for seniors at assisted living and skilled nursing facilities as well as senior centers and independent living communities throughout 0assachusetts and 5hode Island since 1 .
:hile /eanues was singing -ohn enver’s “&ountry 5oads: at the most recent café on 6aturday, a man who had been sitting Tuietly at a table began clapping to the music. :hen /eanues handed him the microphone, the
man sang the rest of the verses while other participants danced joyfully with their caregivers.
“It’s a lot of fun and people just light up when the music starts, says raham.
The refreshments and entertainment for the Bellingham café are paid for each month with generous donations provided by Benchmark 6enior /iving at )orge ill in )ranklin and Atria raper 3lace in opedale.
The Bellingham program hosts upwards of 0 participants each month, many of whom also visit other memory cafes in the area, including in )ranklin, opkinton and :alpole.
“Its a great program because there’s no judgment, says /isa Bragdon of Bellingham, who has been bringing her 0-year-old aunt to the café since it began in -anuary.
“It’s enriching and you never have to worry. There’s no frustration, she says. “It’s a time to just let go, smile, have some fun and make positive memories. 0y aunt says while she can’t remember the names of the other people she meets here, she knows they are her friends.
raham, a Bridewater 6tate &ollege graduate who was an engage life instructor at Atria raper 3lace before coming to the Bellingham 6enior &enter a year ago, says she hopes more people who are caring for a loved one with dementia or Al heimer’s disease will consider attending a memory café.
“It’s a great way for people to sociali e, rela and feel like they are not so alone on their journey, she says.
Anyone interested in attending the Bellingham memory café can just show up on the day or they can make a reservation by contacting raham at 0 - 11 or by email at Tgraham bellinghamma.org.
To find a memory café in your area, visit www.memorycafedirectory.com