A CALL TO PARENTS
Meeting helps moms, dads, others steer kids from violence
Parents who have lost their sons and daughters to violence don’t want another child to die, but members of a local organization believe some parents don’t know what steps to take to protect their families.
Organizers of a Thursday “Call to Parents” believe they have answers. They are looking to alleviate violence by mobilizing moms and dads to take control of their children. Parenting experts and mentoring organizations will be in attendance to support parents who want help instructing their children and enforcing their rules.
“When we turn our backs, our kids are socially influenced or inclined to make decisions that they shouldn’t make that could hurt their future or hurt somebody else’s future,” says Amy Smartt, spokewoman for Healing On Both Sides, which is hosting the meeting. “If the parent can’t help their situation, then we want to help the parent.”
The group invites all mothers, fathers, grandparents and others raising children to meet at the Olivet Baptist Church Kingdom Center at 6 p.m. Thursday.
Father to the Fatherless, First Things First and the Chattanooga Justice League will be among the groups available to help parents.
The meeting will include educators, pastors and police who will discuss the dangerous activity in which they’ve seen youth involved and how more parental involvement can help.
Authorities suspect parents aren’t aware of some activities in which youth are involved.
“Kids get on social media and say there’s going to be a fight at a certain location at a certain time. Sometimes 200 kids show up to watch,” says James Moreland, founder of Healing On Both Sides. “The average parent doesn’t know that their kid is one of them.”
He says children join gangs as young as age 10, many times without their parents’ knowledge.
Among the guest speakers are Orchard Knob Middle School principal Tiffany Earvin, Chattanooga assistant police chief Edwin McPherson and the Rev. Kevin Adams.
Moreland coordinated A Call to Parents after being contacted by a woman who needed help controlling her 14-year-old son. She wanted her son to be in the house at a certain time, but he paid her rules no mind. She wanted the city to have a curfew to get youth off the street. Moreland told her as the parent she sets the curfew.
If parents don’t take control of youth, there will be more bloodshed, he says.
“Let’s talk about responsibility,” says Moreland. “You as a parent, you are the judge. You are the jury, the CEO. You are the lawyer, anything you want to call it, to say you are totally responsible for your kid.”
Parents don’t need to treat children as friends. They need to establish rules. If the curfew is 9 p.m. that’s the rule in that house, he says.
A Call to Parents organizers will have tables with professional counselors available for parents who need assistance, Moreland says.
About half of the 15 people who died this year to homicide listed on the Chattanooga Times Free Press site, The Toll, are under age 21.
Smartt says Kieara Patton, her daughter, would have had a different outcome if Patton’s father had been more involved.
Patton’s life ended at age 20 in 2014 after Taylor Satterfield, her boyfriend and the father of their two children, shot her in the head.
Satterfield was found guilty of second-degree murder and sentenced to 22 years in prison in 2016.
Smartt told her daughter that Satterfield wasn’t good for her. She believes that warning would have been more convincing had it come from Patton’s father.
“Girls listen to their dad,” Smartt says. “And she would have known more of her worth. You learn that from your father.”
Smartt says she was 19 and Patton’s father was 20 when their daughter was born. She feels he probably didn’t understand the importance of being in her life.
Smartt says the pain of losing a daughter plagues her daily and she wants to help other parents protect their children so they don’t experience the same despair.
“I cry almost all day every day, still,” she says. “I know the emotional process is hard, and I don’t want anyone else to go through that.”
Contact Yolanda Putman at yputman@timesfreepress.com or 423-7576431.
“When we turn our backs, our kids are socially influenced or inclined to make decisions that they shouldn’t make that could hurt their future or hurt somebody else’s future.” AMY SMARTT