‘Turner & Hooch,” the mighty redux
Are you ready for the “new” version of “Turner & Hooch”? The fact that we live in a world where somebody would think that was a good idea baffles yours truly. But the purpose of this column is to review “Turner & Hooch,” particularly for those who’ve never seen the original. And I guess that includes me.
If I had to bet on which Tom Hanks movie I’ve chosen to avoid (and there are a surprising number of them) that TV would recycle, I would have placed my chips on a “Joe Versus the Volcano” reboot. But I would be wrong, and I guess that’s why I don’t gamble.
As we all know, even those who’ve never seen it, “Turner & Hooch,” now reanimated and streaming on Disney+, is a buddy cop comedy pairing a fussy male police officer and a slobbering mastiff. Think of “Monk” drenched with saliva.
Josh Peck is cast as Turner. He’s a young actor who appeared on Nickelodeon when he was even younger. He avoids comparisons to Tom Hanks by resembling Adam Sandler. First seen, he’s a bit of a loner, an ambitious detective so busy that he avoids his family and counts his Roomba vacuum cleaner as his friend. Maybe his only friend.
In a brisk pilot, his sister delivers the shocking news that their recently deceased father has bequeathed him the giant Hooch, something he may have intuited had he picked up the phone or listened to his mother’s many messages. This is an early indication that Turner may have some weird issues. Call me old-fashioned, but it’s hard to be the nice guy and ignore your widowed mother at the same time.
As you might expect, Hooch slobbers all over Turner’s obsessive/ compulsive existence, inspiring him to take Dad’s bequest to the pound. Then, as in every melodrama dating back to vaudeville, that fateful step is interrupted by the arrival of Erica (Vanessa Lengies), a sweet dog trainer and potential love interest, and by Turner’s discovery that Hooch may be the better detective.
There’s very little in “Turner” that would sail over the head of the average 7-year-old. In addition to drooling and destroying couches, Hooch is very good at chewing scenery. Look for a lot of canine reaction shots, soulful eyes and tilting heads.
“Turner” unfolds in such an obvious and formulaic manner that it frequently seems like a parody of both buddy cop comedies and boy-meetsdog romances. Essentially, it’s “Lethal Weapon” meets “Lassie.”
Not to give too much away, but there’s a moment during a violent shootout in a burning warehouse when Turner takes time to deliver a “You are my forever dog” speech to Hooch that suggests that perhaps Erica should throw herself at somebody else.
› Hidden cameras and smartphone voyeurs capture airline passengers at their most beastly on the new and thoroughly depressing reality series “Fasten Your Seatbelt” (10 p.m., A&E, TV-14).
› Explorers go “Hunting Atlantis” (9 p.m., Discovery) and find remains that may be linked to Noah’s Ark. Perhaps they’ll also find out where the Easter Bunny hides the other 364 days of the year.