ALL TRICKS, NO TREATS
Boo!
Ah, Halloween.
The ultimate celebration of trick or treat.
So let’s talk TREAT.
It’s been reported Americans now spend an estimated $6 billion annually on Halloween; this nation’s second-largest commercial holiday after Christmas.
And in 2021, nearly $500 million was spent on pet costumes; a bowwow double the amount spent the previous year.
Now let’s turn to TRICK? In ancient times, a trickster was a character who exhibited secret knowledge; an ability to use it to play tricks, disobey normal rules, and defy conventional behavior. A deceiver.
A shapeshifter.
A master of disguise.
A situation diverter. A messenger.
An imitator of the gods. Who could be sacred … and lewd.
Sound familiar? Know anyone like that?
So I’ve been thinking about today’s tricksters now that Halloween is approaching.
♦ Tricksters pedaling “newspapers” costumed as credible.
♦ Tricksters peddling trash for cash via erroneous political TV ads, scissoring news bites from credible journalists.
♦ Tricksters jamming letter boxes with political drivel and tittle-tattle.
Ghost stories and mischiefmaking have come a long way from Halloween’s birth as a Celtic pagan festival — a time the “gods” could play “tricks” on humans during harvest time — and before a Catholic pope decided 1,200 years ago it was wiser to convert non-Christians with sugar rather than … assault.
But on the eve of Halloween 2022, let’s consider today’s political shapeshifters!
♦ Shapeshifter No. 1: Georgia’s Republican senatorial candidate Herschel Walker, a former football star, who supports a ban on abortions with NO exception for rape, incest or saving the life of a mother — yet continues to adamantly deny multiple accusations of paying for ex-girlfriends’ abortions.
His response: “You know, people have done that, but I know nothing about it,” he told the press. “And if I knew about it, I would be honest and talk about it, but I know nothing about that.”
♦ Shapeshifter shadow candidate No. 1: Former President Donald Trump’s ability to declassify all the documents seized by the FBI in their search of his Mar-a-Lago home — including those marked top secret.
His response: “I declassified everything,” adding his ability as president enabled him to do so because “you can declassify just by saying, ‘it’s declassified’ — even by thinking about it.”
The bottom line: WHO WANTS A SHAPESHIFTER TO SHAPE UP WHEN POLLS SHOW THEY ARE NOT GOING TO BE SHIPPED OUT?
So consider the star of the Dem shapeshifter dilemma?
President Joe Biden, a Democrat seizing on a rebounding economy with midterm elections a week away, is a politician with polls hammering him on inflation; who occasionally stutters and gets twittered to death for looking stiff and old.
Midterm polls show it would not be a stretch for concerned Democrats hoping Biden could slip into a poll shapeshifter roll right now.
In the meantime, it’s probably a good bet until Halloween is over to momentarily veer off the annus horribilis in the world and focus on the brilliant intensity of leaf color in Chicago.
And looking forward to a Halloween of doorbell-ringing children who have NO desire to perform tricks.
Boo and Yahoo!
Fly ’em ...
The Trump campaign bots are flying high again.
They are now offering an “exclusive tour” of the Donald’s re-conditioned “Trump Force One” for a donation to his “Save America” shadow president campaign fund.
“I told my team I want YOU to have the chance to see it for YOURSELF,” the Donald bot bleated … promising a picture on board with their “favorite president.”
Fly, bye-bye.
Sneedlings…
Yep. Yep. Yep. Actor Johnny Depp was spotted dolloping the dinner dishes at TAO restaurant last Tuesday night with friends decked out in hats and hoodies. No, he wasn’t dressed like his film character Jack Sparrow. But probably close. … Memo to Skinny Sheehan: Got your note Special Olympics Chicago/Special Children’s Charities alert is hosting a reception from 5:30-8 p.m. on Nov. 30 at the Old Post Office to raise funds for their athletes. … A sign of spring during autumn? After a two-year hiatus, Pierrot Gourmet, the Peninsula’s street side cafe, is reopening. … Saturday birthdays: actress Gabrielle Union,
50; actress Tracee Ellis Ross, 50, and actress Winona Ryder, 51. … Sunday birthdays: businesswoman Ivanka Trump, 41; actress Nia Long, 52, and actor Henry Winkler, 77. … And a belated birthday to Hillary Clinton, 75, whose husband, Bill, tweeted his betrothed was his beloved best friend.