Ari Bendersky & Drew Harris
When same-sex marriage was legalized last year, Ari Bendersky and Drew Harris— who had been dating for 15 years— were elated. “We always said we wouldn’t getmarried until we could legally be married where we lived,” said Bendersky, director of content for Abesmarket.com and former founding editor of Eater Chicago.
So as soon as the law passed, Harris, field training manager of Jack Spade, made his move. “We’re both Jewish, so Christmas Day for us is going to the movies and having Chinese food,” he says. After ordering takeout from their favorite spot, Sun Wah BBQ( 5039 N. Broadway), Harris gave Bendersky a custom- made fortune cookie that contained-a-marriage proposal. “I was giddy, crying and laughing,” Bendersky says.
One of the first steps in planning the wedding: securing their close friend, DJ Matt Roan, for the big day. “Matt has been a friend of ours formore than 10 years,” Bendersky says. “He said,‘ Name the date and place and I’m there.’” On Columbus Day weekend, the couple’s wedding party traveled to Gordon Lodge ( 1420 Pine, Baileys Harbor, Wisconsin) for a fall- themed weekend bash. “We waited almost 16 years to have a wedding, so todo it in just one evening didn’t seem enough,” Bendersky says. The three- day event kicked off with bowling on Thursday and an adult field day on Friday, where everyone dressed in costumes inspired by the campy 2001 movie “Wet Hot American Summer,” and culminated in a beautiful ceremony with 115 of the couple’s closest friends and family.
On Saturday, the couple recited their vows under a stunning chuppah crafted by their friend Barry Gork— then put their own twist on a few Jewish traditions. “The seven blessings are [ usually] read by the rabbi, but we picked seven couples to stand up during the ceremony and read a different blessing,” Harris says. Later, the party moved to the event center, where Roan and Bendersky’s father stole the show. “My dad played drums in a band, so Drew surprised him with a drum kit,” Bendersky says. “He was in his element and everyone ate it up.” The couple remembers never leavin gone another’s side throughout the whole weekend. “We were together somuch of the night and it naturally happened,” Bendersky says. “We got to truly be a couple together officially and legally with everyone for the first time.”