Casual interview conversation may require a little planning
“S o, how ‘bout this weather?”
If you’ve ever tried to make a quick connection at the beginning of a job interview, there’s a good chance you’ve used the above ice-breaking statement that probably made you cringe as soon as the words left your mouth.
Despite our reluctance to embrace the tried-and-true opener, it does have its merit. You ask about the weather because it’s a shared experience, something that both you and the interviewer are dealing with in real-time, whether it’s a blizzard or a perfect day. Besides, what else are you supposed to talk about? Dish on the latest episode of “Below Deck” with someone who potentially despises Captain Lee? Brag about the Sox to a lifelong Cubs fan? Offer your opinions on Donald Trump?
Interview small talk can be tricky but that doesn’t mean it isn’t important. You’re trying to find some commonality with your interviewer, a connection with the person who will have a direct hand in hiring you, moving you on to the next level or throwing you off the island. In some cases, you can do a little research beforehand and learn about your interviewer’s interests. Or maybe you can find a nugget of information that straddles the line between that person’s business role and pop culture that makes for good banter. In most cases, however, you’ll be interviewing with an unknown entity, leaving you little knowledge of what that person likes or dislikes, so it’s best to have an idea of what you might want to cover.
If you are trying to put together a list of things to talk about, keep in mind that it’s just as important to consider things not to talk about. With those parameters in mind, here’s a list of some do’s and don’ts concerning small talk during a job interview:
• Do talk about the obvious. As mentioned above, people make fun of weather and sports-talk but it’s low-hanging fruit when looking for a topic for conversation. If you have an amusing rainrelated anecdote about your commute that morning, go ahead and share. It may lead to a brief, casual discussion about driving in the rain.
• Don’t talk about politics. Even if you learn that your potential hiring manager is passionate about a political cause or candidate, it is best to keep those feelings to yourself. Unless it pertains directly to the job, any political leanings shouldn’t be obvious to your interviewer.
• Do mention something about the setting: Mentioning the history of the building may score a few points. Or maybe you can bring up the company’s obvious dedication to plants, given the small greenhouse in the lobby, or the selection of original works of art on its walls. If it’s applicable, mention something pertaining to the decor of your interviewer’s office. Whatever you decide, mentioning something about the physical location or office space within the building is almost equivalent to the friendly things people might say about your home upon their first visit. Think about that neighbor who mentioned how much she loves your couch when she first stopped in to introduce herself, despite the fact that everyone else in your home hates the couch. Even the people who sold you that couch hate that couch. But your couch-appreciating neighbor? Friend for life.
• Don’t get too personal. If you see a photo on your interviewer’s desk of her and her family, don’t mention the fact that you have two daughters as well, unless your interviewer brings it up. While it may be appropriate small talk in other scenarios, HR specialists tell me they find it a little off-putting when job candidates make assumptions based on photos in their office. An HR friend said she actually puts all her office photos away before she interviews candidates because job candidates often assumed her nieces were her daughters, and it just made for some awkward moments before the interview even started.
• Do keep it short. You need to realize when your interviewer has given a closed-ended answer, signaling that he wants to move on to the meat of the interview. If you find that you have something like marathon training in common, you can mention it and get a response, but then let it go. Keep in mind that your interviewer is there to find an appropriate candidate for the job, not a new training partner.
• Don’t lie. Sometimes it’s easy to get carried away when you’re making small talk and say things that just aren’t true. You may think you’re making a connection by telling the obvious 49ers fan that you have season tickets but unless you’re ready to cash in that chip if you get hired, it’s best to stick with the truth. The same goes for trips and various experiences. If there’s a photo of your interviewer climbing Mont Blanc — and you purposely take the inside seat on the train because you hate looking out the window when the tracks are elevated — resist the urge to say “Hey, I climbed Mont Blanc, too!”
• Do talk about restaurants. When I asked what subjects HR professionals enjoy chatting about before the real interview kicks in, many of them said they like talking about the restaurants that are near the office. People casually bring up a restaurant nearby or on the first floor of the building and the next thing you know, there’s a quick conversation about what’s good or not so good about the mentioned restaurant, and maybe an ensuing discussion about other restaurants or food in general. When an interviewer says something like “I’ll check out that Ethiopian place you mentioned” when the interviewer’s over, there’s a good chance you’ve given them something to remember about you. And in this era of Instagrammed meals and Yelp reviews, restaurants seem to be displacing weather and sports teams as the pre-interview conversation of choice.