What’s the college football season like for those players who chose to opt out?

Ra’Von Bonner told himself not to cry. The Illinois running back doesn’t regret his decision not to play this season. But watching a game instead of competing, especially when his teammates struggled, stirred up emotions Bonner had hoped were quelled.

“It was really, really emotional for me. I even cried after watching the game,” Bonner said of the Illini’s 45-7 seasonopening loss at Wisconsin last week. “Watching it, it’s different. I knowthe plays. I know what people’s assignments are. Those are stillmy brothers. It’s not like, ‘Oh, I’m gone.’ I spent a lot of time there and grew up with those guys. To see them lose and lose like that, it was very hard. I don’t like to cry.”

Bonner is one of 24 Big Ten players who chose to opt out this season — an option presented in light of the risks players might be taking by competing during the COVID-19 pandemic.

The NCAA Board of Directors ruled schools must honor scholarships if players elected not to play, and players can return next season without losing eligibility.

High-profile players such as Virginia Tech’s Caleb Farley, Miami’s Gregory Rousseau and Penn State’s Micah Parsons opted out, preferring to prepare for the NFL draft instead. According to The Athletic, 117 players opted out of the season.

Some, such as Minnesota receiver Rashod Bateman and Ohio State cornerback Shaun Wade, opted back in after the Big Ten reversed course and voted to play this fall.

Despite his emotions watching the Illini loss with a few family and friends at his mom’s home in Cincinnati, Bonner has no regrets about skipping his senior season.

“I’m still at peace with my decision and knowing I made the right one,” he said.

Some players who chose to sit out experience a mix of emotions, a similar resolve in their decision and the bizarre feeling of having more free time than ever.

“I talked to some people, like, ‘What do you do with your time?’ ” Iowa linebacker Djimon Colbert said.

He has a German shepherd-Labrador mix puppy who is “keeping me entertained.”

Colbert, a juniorwho started every game last season, watched Iowa’s 24-20 loss to Purdue on Saturday alone in his apartment.

“I came to terms withmy decision when I made it,” he said. “(Watching the game) wasn’t a bad experience for me. I watched some of my guys out there get a chance to play. It definitely was weird, though. I’ve been out there two years playing. This ismy first time being at home for a Hawkeyes football game.”

Colbert’s concerns about COVID-19 led him to opt out early. He said several family members have contracted the virus and his uncle died after being hospitalized with it.

“That was pretty shocking,” he said. “Thatmademe look at the whole situation differently.”

Seeing Wisconsin players contract the virus after one game also validated his decision.

“You don’t know much about this virus, to pinpoint who has it, who doesn’t, which tests work, which don’t,” Colbert said earlier this week when only Badgers quarterback Graham Mertz’s positive test was reported. “Seeing that stuff, it didn’t make me feel better, like wanting to go out there on the field.”

Since the Mertz news broke, Wisconsin announced a team outbreak that forced the cancellation of their game Saturday against Nebraska.

But Colbert saw an added bonus to opting out: extra time to heal.

He had surgery in January to repair a torn labrum, which requires a six-month recovery process and caused him to lose 20 pounds. He continued to work out but COVID-19 restrictions kept him fromsome teamworkouts this summer.

Extra time this season would allow him to return next season in optimal shape, Colbert said.

“I wasn’t making the progress I wanted to make,” he said. “In the summer, I still didn’t think I was where I wanted to be, so thatwas another factor.”

Some players took the opportunity to prepare for the draft instead of playing in a season that could be canceled at any time.

Northwestern offensive tackle Rashawn Slater decided to forgo his final season. He returned to Texas, his home state, to train.

“It was really hard for me,” Slater told The Athletic. “The guys on that team are truly my brothers. But focusing on my long-term goals was best for me. It is going to be tough to watch those guys this season.”

Bonner said the extra time without workouts has given him more time to dedicate to his graduate studies in social work. He has loaded up on courses, taking 20 credit hours this semester, and is involved inEMPOWER, a group for Illinois athletes of color.

“There is so much that I’m learning,” he said. “It’s just so cool. This is whatI’m going to do withmy life. This is what I’m going to be diving into, whether it’s learning how law and social work go together or cognitive behavioral therapy. It’s all great. I’m really enjoying learning and just growing as a young professional.”

Bonner decided to withdraw from playing as the virus spread across the nation. He has asthma, and both of his grandmothers are cancer survivors.

He doesn’t use social media but said he knows there are critics of those who decided not to play.

“I don’t get into that drama,” Bonner said. “Some people have to ask that and I told them the same thing: I just didn’t think it was the best decision. People can say whatever they want to say. We’re the ones risking (our) lives and risking the lives (of others). Thatwon’t beme.”

He hasn’t concentrated on whether he should play next season, using his final season of eligibility. He still is working out to stay in shape.

“I don’t really have to think about it at this moment,” Bonner said.

Meanwhile, watching the Iowa game from the couch stirred another emotion in Colbert.

“I definitely feel it already, that fire,” he said. “It lights a fire under me to make sure I’m in the best position for when I’m back out there.”