Party patrol: Be careful at events celebrating return to work

As employees head back to the office, many companies may begin holding meet-and-greet events for their returning workers. Sure, you haven’t seen your co-workers in person for a while but don’t forget that work events aren’t the place to get rip-roaring drunk and start impromptu dance-offs. “The biggest

mistake an employee can make is to forget that behavior can influence future decisions regarding tenure, promotional

advancement and job security,” says Jan Melnik, a career coach in Durham, Connecticut. “Even in an atmosphere of celebration and merriment and whether the party is in the office or in a restaurant or other venue, it’s important that employees remember they are, effectively, on the clock from the standpoint of how more senior staff members and managers will consider their appearance and behavior.”

Even though it may be nice to let loose with the people you spend 40 hours a week with, leave that to non-work-sponsored events. Rather, use the office gatherings to get to know the higher-ups a little better — you never know what

may come of it.

Talking points

“It is perfectly appropriate to discuss some aspects of one’s personal life but nothing too serious or weighty, and, certainly, nothing that would be embarrassing personally or to the listener,” says Melnik. “If you’re comfortable sharing details about one’s life, that is fine, but avoid asking pointed, personal questions of others. Topics relating to politics and religion are verboten and best avoided completely.”

Though you might feel inclined to, don’t fall into the trap of only talking about work. “It’s a break from the norm so don’t just talk about the norm,” says Jane Rollins, an executive coach in Andover, Maryland. “Talk about music, vacations — just small-talk topics, nothing too heavy.”

While getting to know your co-workers can be a good thing, beware of a little too much information leaking out.

Ask questions with caution — some discussions can have unintended consequences, no matter how innocent the conversation may have started out.

“Let them reveal what they want to reveal. Don’t pry too much,” suggests Kyle Becker, workplace expert in Portland, Maine. “If you can sense someone is uncomfortable with a topic, change the topic. Take notice of the small, awkward pauses in the conversations.”

Easy on the sauce

Fight every urge to pound drink after drink, even if there’s an open bar and the margaritas are flowing freely. “You can wreck your entire reputation in a matter of minutes. Talk to most people and they’ll have stories about someone who had too much to drink at an office party and how their career at their company went from there,” says Becker. “I was on a boat — like a summer day-cruise — for a work event and one of our managers was throwing up over the side of the boat — and he wasn’t seasick. It’s hard to live that down. I think he lost a lot of respect from his own team