Lots of Laughs

Hu­mor pro­vided the an­ti­dote to a panty­hose prob­lem.

Country Woman - - CONTENTS - BY ELLY McCARN

Rogue hose in­spires rev­elry.

Years ago, when it was still com­mon for women to wear panty­hose un­der their slacks, I pulled a pair on, then pulled on some pants and went to din­ner with friends. Later that night, as I got ready for bed, I slipped off the hose and my slacks to­gether, and I laid them on a chair.

I had a doc­tor’s ap­point­ment early the next morn­ing and I over­slept, so I hur­riedly took a shower and put on a fresh pair of panty­hose. I de­cided to wear the same slacks I had worn the night be­fore, but I for­got I had slipped off the hose and the slacks to­gether.

Dr. H had been my physi­cian for years, and when he walked into the exam room, he greeted me with, “Good morn­ing, Elly! What ya got hang­ing out of your pant leg?”

I leaned down, pulled out the ex­tra pair of hose and dan­gled them in the air. “I al­ways carry a spare pair!” I replied. Dr. H and his nurse had a good laugh, but I was so em­bar­rassed! I silently told my­self this was never go­ing to hap­pen again.

A few months later I went to a movie, and again, I slipped off my panty­hose and slacks to­gether and laid them on a chair when I got home. The next morn­ing, once again, I put on a fresh pair of panty­hose un­der the slacks I had worn the night be­fore.

I drove my van to a car re­pair shop for an oil change. Af­ter drop­ping off my keys with the tech­ni­cian, I went to the wait­ing room, where cof­fee and donuts were set out for the cus­tomers. I got my snack and went to sit down on one of the two fac­ing benches in the room.

The two older men sit­ting on the op­po­site bench watched ev­ery move I made. I leaned over to place my purse by my feet, and what did I see? Last night’s panty­hose stick­ing out of my pant leg. I knew those four eyes were fo­cused right on me, so with­out look­ing up, I slowly pulled the hose from my pants, dan­gled them in the air, smiled and said cheer­fully, “I al­ways carry a spare pair!” They got quite a laugh out of that.

For­tu­nately, only a minute later their names were called over the loud­speaker; their car was ready. As they got up, they said they hadn’t had a laugh like that in years and ac­tu­ally thanked me. They were still laugh­ing as they walked to their car.

That was the day I stopped wear­ing panty­hose un­der slacks. But I of­ten won­der how many times those two men told the story about the lady who al­ways car­ried a spare pair of panty­hose in­side her pant legs.

Share your most em­bar­rass­ing mo­ment or cutest kid quip.

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