Last word on astrology
Happy Birthday:
Being a good listener will help you fly under the radar when faced with controversy. The information you gather will give you an inside view of what’s possible and an advantage in competitive situations. Turn this year into one of progress, hard work and rewards that encourage you to let go of the past and move forward with optimism. Your numbers are 3, 11, 19, 25, 28, 36, 44.
Aries (March 21-April 19):
Push for what you want. Take charge of entertainment. Step into the spotlight and show everyone what you can contribute. Your attitude will make a difference to the reception you receive. Let charm, intellect and action be your calling cards. ★★★
Taurus (April 20-May 20):
Listen to good advice and revise your plans to ensure success. Keep tabs on what’s going on, but don’t interfere in something that can disrupt your relationship with someone you love. Take better care of your health, reputation and position. ★★★
Gemini (May 21-June 20):
You’ll draw attention if you speak up and share your thoughts. Look for opportunities, and you’ll come across something that makes you feel comfortable and excited about your future. Explore the possibilities and head in the direction that suits your lifestyle. ★★★★★
Cancer (June 21-July 22):
Take a step back from whatever situation you face and rethink your strategy. Too much of anything will set you back.
Keep life simple, control your reactions and pursue long-term goals. Being insightful and resourceful is encouraged, and self-improvement is favored. ★★
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22):
Refuse to let the changes others make lead you astray. Concentrate on what’s important, and rely on intelligence to close deals. Don’t expect to please everyone, but do your best to be fair and offer options to eliminate conflict. ★★★★
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Change begins with you and your choices. Dig deep, and you’ll discover what makes you happy. Incorporate your skills with plans that put a smile on your face. Take control and join forces with people who share your sentiments. ★★★
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
Don’t let sentimentality take over. Revise your day to include putting your responsibilities behind you before moving on to enjoyable pastimes. Having the discipline and insight to do things right the first time will help you avoid criticism. ★★★
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
Address issues that limit progress. Finish what you start before you move on to something new. Refuse to let things build up that will stand between you and what you need. Focus on health, emotional well-being and taking care of business. 3 stars
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Money matters will escalate if you are too generous. Don’t let anyone take advantage of your charitable attitude. Put more time and effort into your home, and invest in yourself and your future. Learn from the experts. ★★★★
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
Keep moving forward, regardless of what others do or say. Put your energy into transformation. Nurture relationships and adjust your living arrangements to suit your needs. You can’t buy love, but you can earn respect. ★★
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Don’t let uncertainty throw you off course. Choose the path that interests you most, and don’t worry about what everyone else pursues. Take responsibility for your happiness, and look for opportunities that encourage you to follow your heart. ★★★★★
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20):
Wheel and deal until you get the results you want. A financial gain is possible if you invest in something familiar to you. A lifestyle change looks promising; however, you may require a push to head in a new direction. ★★★
— Eugenia Last
DEAR AMY » My brother and I are both in our late 30s.
After years of strife and our mother’s refusal to respect any of our stated boundaries, in early 2020 (after several pointless therapy sessions with her), we made the decision to go “no contact.”
We told her in therapy and in writing that we were no longer going to have a relationship, along with the SPECIFIC reasons why.
Coincidentally, both of us were also moving to new homes and we told her that we would not give her our new addresses.
She ignored that, hired a lawyer and a private investigator, got our addresses, and had things delivered to our homes.
She had a famous “specialist” in estranged families reach out to us.
She had her lawyer contact us. She sent emails and physical mail to both of our workplaces. We did not respond.
Finally, she had a family friend, “Laura” contact me.
Laura is very nice. About 15 years ago, she let me stay at her home in Europe.
Her email basically stated that our mother is devastated by the estrangement, family will always be family, no one is perfect, etc. etc.
There was nothing indicating that our mother has made any adjustments or that a renewed relationship would be anything other than the constant turmoil of the past.
None of this is Laura’s fault. I don’t want to be a jerk.
Do I have any obligation to respond?
I’m concerned that my mother would interpret any response as a sign that her persistence is “working.”
— Estranged
DEAR ESTRANGED » When parents write to me about estrangement, they frequently state that they have no idea why an estrangement has occurred, and yet — your mother does know the reason, because you have told her.
She has designated her amiable friend to be her representative, because all of her more outrageous and aggressive attempts have failed. She is now “using” her friend, which is another boundary she has crossed — with her friend and with you.
“Laura” has stated a number of truisms: Family will always be family, no one is perfect, etc. etc. There is nothing in the message to indicate that your mother is making a move toward change.
You are not obligated to reply. If you do reply, I suggest that you respond: “I received your email. I am reminded again of your kindness when I was traveling in Europe all those years ago. Thank you again for your hospitality. Otherwise, I hope you are well.”
That’s it. If she contacts you again as your mother’s representative without any specific indications regarding change, then you can further make your point by ignoring it.
DEAR AMY » My fiancé “Benjamin” and I have been together for four years. We planned and then replanned our wedding because of the pandemic. It has been rescheduled two times now.
Before rescheduling again, we realized we have officially had it. Everything about this big event — the constant concerns about our family members and guests, the details and checklists, and especially the expense — seems ridiculous to us now.
We had a heart-to-heart and have decided to get married quickly and quietly, canceling the celebration.
We are going to disappoint a lot of people. Frankly, we’re a little freaked out about that.
Words of courage, please?
— Nervous
DEAR NERVOUS » I commend you for anchoring your plans now to your important intention, which is to get married.
Go to the courthouse next weekend — if that is what you want to do. You could notify local immediate family to witness and have lunch afterward (if you want). One caution: Don’t post your news on social media until you notify all of your wedding guests about your ultimate change of plans — perhaps accompanied by a photo of your little ceremony.
These guests should be the first to know.
Word your notification carefully and lovingly, thank people for hanging in there through the ups and downs of your planning, invite people to call you if they have questions, and — move on with your married life.
Contact Amy Dickinson via email, askamy@ amydickinson.com.