Daily Camera (Boulder)

Fussy babies lead to fussy concert goers

- Contact Amy Dickinson via email, askamy@ amydickins­on.com.

DEAR AMY >> I recently attended a community band concert, which was spoiled by small children in the audience, crying and fussing. To make matters worse, the family was sitting at the front of the auditorium, so they added to the distractio­n by not only walking the entire length of the auditorium to remove the crying children, but returning with them later — all the way to the front.

What is wrong with inconsider­ate people who ruin a pleasant experience, not only for the other concertgoe­rs, but also for the performers who have worked hard to put on the performanc­e?

What should one say to these parents? Tell them to sit in the back row so they can make a hasty exit with fussy children? Ask them to leave and not come back? Leave the kiddies at home with a babysitter?

— Distracted Concertgoe­r

DEAR DISTRACTED >> It is a shame that young members of the community spoiled your experience at a community concert.

But there’s an old showbiz saying that I believe applies here:

Thems the breaks, sister!

This is a community concert. Community bands and choruses are wonderful organizati­ons where dedicated amateur musicians dust off instrument­s from the back of their coat closets, attend a number of rehearsals, and perform for a grateful and understand­ing audience.

Yes, parents should hustle crying and fussing babies out — and then bring them back in when they’ve calmed down (during applause in between musical selections).

But here’s a reminder: Many people are only now venturing out again after years of being sequestere­d. It’s noisy out here in the world!

You might try to hear the noises made by fractious babies as being part of the larger human symphony. To many of us, it truly is music to our ears.

DEAR AMY >> Before my son was born over 40 years ago, my ex-husband was said to have a low sperm count.

We decided to use artificial inseminati­on to conceive our eldest.

After he was born, we had two other children naturally without artificial inseminati­on.

My husband and I divorced after 20 years of marriage. We are both happily remarried.

My problem is that I don’t know if I should tell my son.

I have tried to communicat­e with my ex, and even though we are on friendly terms, he refuses to answer my texts about this.

He obviously does not want to deal with it.

I think my son should know. After my ex and I are dead, he or one of his children may have a medical issue where he needs to know the facts of his conception.

I am in a quandary and have no idea what to do.

Your advice?

— Mom

DEAR MOM >> You feel strongly that your son should know the truth behind his conception (I agree).

You are not able to get his father to participat­e in this important conversati­on, but you are his mother, and so you should go ahead and tell him.

I believe that knowing the truth of your DNA is a human right.

Your son might greet this news with shock, disbelief, and sadness. He might face a challenge wondering how he relates to his father and siblings. He might choose to shelve this topic permanentl­y — or pick it up later.

Open the door, and keep it open. Let him walk through. Answer every question truthfully, and offer your continued support.

The Donor Sibling Registry (https://donorsibli­ngregistry.com/) offers an array of tools and informatio­n for donor conceived people and their families.

DEAR AMY >> Your answer to “Not Going to Apologize This Time” was bad.

Their father came to show his respect for their mother at her funeral.

She was a huge part of his life, good and bad. He may have many tender memories. These children denied him this poignant goodbye.

A funeral is a formal chance for everyone to mourn, and not a time to air personal resentment. I’m disappoint­ed with your answer.

— V

DEAR V >> This man, who treated their mother “terribly,” claimed that he was attending the funeral “to support his children.” His children did not want him there. Showing respect for their needs was one way he could have honored the relationsh­ip.

 ?? ??

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from United States