Pamela Feeley Marvin, of Woodstock
Early on April 2, 2018, Pamela Feeley Marvin, a lifetime resident of Woodstock, N.Y., passed into the loving arms of the Lord, an embrace she gracefully avoided to hurry on to her family, her many friends, and her beloved Lee for a reunion bash many years in the making. It was said that Pam surrounded herself with brilliant and talented people, but it was they who flocked to her, and once there, never left her side. Recently she marveled at how fortunate she was to have so many incredibly talented, gifted people from all walks of life as friends. And with characteristic humility, she wondered why they seemed to like her so much. Anyone who knew Pam could answer that, and each with a different answer.
One of the first female radio personalities, she brought in double the advertising dollars of her male counterparts. Despite her successes and popularity, a new program director told her soon after he took over he was going to replace her because he “didn’t like the idea of a woman on the radio.” Undaunted, she had the satisfaction of turning down his urgent requests to interview her years later, using his very words to decline.
She held a world record in fishing, catching a 687-pound Blue Marlin while out off the coast of Hawaii. She was a talented cook who would never forget to bake a pie or cook someone their favorite meal when she knew they were coming.
She stood staunchly against the corrupt, the dishonest, the greedy, and anyone who dared dishonor or impugn those under her aegis, or the values she represented. She was quick to correct anyone with the misguided notion that she needed any help in these rare battles, for she feared neither man nor beast. At 88, she would fearlessly walk outside banging pots and pans together and cursing to confront the packs of Javelina (tusked desert pigs) gorging on the plentiful flowers she kept around the patio. She would bring water to remote areas of the Southern Arizona desert so that a human being wouldn’t have to die of thirst for crossing the border. When she saw injustice, she wrote, sending hundreds of letters to the editors of major newspapers, seeking justice wherever it had been denied. She spent weeks trying to get an explanation for why an unfortunate man was shot to death over a case of beer. She made so much noise the chief of police invited her down and gave her a friendly tour of his station, and ended up giving her all the files they had been reluctant to give. Her many buddies from the 4th Division Marines or the Reunion of Honor trips would be the first to say she epitomized the Warrior Spirit, fervently despising the human malady of war and the misery and suffering it entails. She saved her most severe criticism for those world leaders who, having never fought in battle or perhaps having cowardly shied away from the responsibility, would nonetheless foment war to appease vanity.
To that end we ask that instead of flowers, you send donations to the progressive Democratic organization of your choice, then celebrate your loved ones with a glass of wine or box of dark chocolates. She would prefer you have both. We are in awe that one person could have so much love, compassion, and resilience -- for anyone in her orbit
Words are inadequate to do more than hint at who she was, and while much of this has described things she did a and what she liked and didn’t, to those of us in her family she was our very foundation and an inexhaustible wellspring of strength and inspiration. Although she is no longer with us, we find ourselves –unimaginably-standing together on solid ground because of the sheer intensity of her love for and faith in each of us. So while we all grieve, we also celebrate the good fortune of having the time we had with such a remarkable, generous, and elegant lady. She wanted a celebration of her life not a sad and solemn procession about her passing (although she added “still, people better be sad!”) We are all sad, but at the same time joyful to be together to send her off the way she wanted.
Viewing will be held Sunday, April 15, 2018, at 11 a.m. Services to follow at 1 p.m. at the Lasher Funeral Home, 100 Tinker St., Woodstock, N.Y. 12498. Reception to follow at her Bearsville home.