Daily Local News (West Chester, PA)
Reading the tells of Chip Kelly
With the firing of Steve Sarkisian as head football coach at the University of Southern California this past week, there’s been growing speculation that the Trojans will be (or have been) courting Philadelphia Eagles boss Chip Kelly to fill their vacant role on the sideline in 2016. It certainly seems like a match made in football heaven. I mean, do you think the west’s flagship program would jump at the chance to land a man who won at a 91-percent clip in the Pac 12 conference at Oregon, and did so by mostly recruiting talent from the southern California region? Seriously, Chip Kelly goes with Hollywood like the Kardashians, sunshine and bo-
tox. Fugetaboutit! Done deal.
Of course, Kelly made an effort to squash the speculation during a media conference this week, stating that he will continue trying to build the Eagles into winners.
But like in the game of poker, if we seek the truth, we must read the tells.
So, being the 10-time No-limit Hold’em world champion that I am (no need to Google that), I’m here to translate what the Eagles coach was really saying about his possible departure to L.A. ...
Kelly: “I hope someday to be like (New York Giants) Coach (Tom) Coughlin and win enough games where I can stay around long enough where that speculation ends.”
Translation: “I hope to someday win enough games, but it’s not going to be here in Philly. Marcus Mariota is in Tennessee now. Ugh! Stupid draft!”
Kelly: “I understand you have to ask the question (linking him to USC).”
Translation: “I know, right? It’s a natural fit, USC and I. Duh.”
Kelly: “I answered it the same way a year ago.”
Translation: “I was coming off a playoff campaign. I figured I’d be shining the Lombardi at the end of season two.”
Kelly: “I answered it the same way my first year here.”
Translation: “Umm, yeah ... I wasn’t going back to college while the NCAA was still snoop in’ around my program in Eugene. I had to go in hiding until the dust settled.”
Kelly: “I understand that it’s going to happen (the talks of going back to college) when we’re not successful and we’re not winning.”
Translation: “Get me the hell out of here!”
Kelly: “It’s an unfortunate part of the game.”
Translation: “It’s an unfortunate part of the game ... well, for those who aren’t in line to get paid $10 million per by Pat Haden to save his career.”
Kelly: “My players could care less about (the USC talk).”
Translation: “My players don’t like me anyway.”
Kelly: “(They keep saying) ‘I came from college. I’m going to go back to college.’”
Translation: “I came from college ...
“I’m going back to college.”