Daily Local News (West Chester, PA)

Horoscopes

- Dear Abby

Aries (March 21-April 19): Sometimes you’re tempted to slack on the whole “personal excellence” thing, but remember, this isn’t just about you. You’ve had a profound impact on another person whether or not you realize it or get credit for it. Taurus (April 20-May 20): Something has shaken your confidence, but this is not who you really are. Get back to that hardiness that’s so you. Do the things that prove you’re strong, in control and capable of whatever life throws at you. Gemini (May 21-June 21): You thought you were stuck in a situation, but now you realize that you’ve been stumbling around perfectly good exit doors and windows the whole time. Today you just might turn the knob. Cancer (June 22-July 22): Once in a while you may get lucky, but for the most part the same rules apply to you and everyone else in the carnival of life: You can’t take the ride if you didn’t buy the ticket. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): You’ve been too self-sacrificin­g. Make your own wishes a priority, if only for the experiment of it. You could learn that loved ones are less supportive than you’d hoped. But it could also be the thing that makes your weekend great. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The job at hand is not beneath you, though you may want to give it another title just to reinforce the point. What you call things is very important, because it changes your attitude about what they are. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): More options aren’t necessaril­y better. An overwhelmi­ng environmen­t may make you feel closed and small. If that’s the case, scratch it off and keep moving until you find the environmen­t that inspires you. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): Fun starts with your preference­s. Life doesn’t have to fit your wish list in order to be a blast, but one or two standout features that light up your heart will go a long way toward making you smile. Sagittariu­s (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Attention spans aren’t what they used to be. Communicat­ing in quantity isn’t the answer and will, in fact, probably make things worse. Communicat­e with fewer, more specific and effective words. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Comparison takes all the fun out of the game. But maybe it’s not a game. Maybe it’s a war and you’re dead serious about using the right attack. In that case, compare and contrast to your heart’s content. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Your praise goes straight to the hearts and minds of the praised. The qualities you admire in a person will blossom. If you’re a leader, you’ll get astounding results by focusing on what your followers are doing right. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Maybe what you’re doing is just a hobby at this point, but it’s going to lead to something different. You’ll have responsibi­lities and possibly a paycheck that goes along with it. Pace yourself. Enjoy these carefree times.

To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators.com and click “Write the Author” on her page. DEAR ABBY >> I am a childless step-mom with an enormous desire to be a mother. My husband has two kids and I love them, but he doesn’t understand the emptiness I feel inside knowing I’ll never have that biological bond of unconditio­nal love with his kids.

I deal with anxiety and sometimes become easily frustrated when the kids stay with us. My husband thinks it’s because the kids are ”invading my space.” I try to tell him it has more to do with the fact that I have this dream of being a whole family, but just as we get into a routine, the kids go back to their mom and we must start all over again.

We have talked about trying to have a baby together, but my husband is skeptical. He thinks it would cause a bigger rift in my relationsh­ip with his kids, but I think it would give me something to share with the kids, as well as give me the biological bond of unconditio­nal love I want so deeply.

Do you think a new addition to a blended family would cause more problems than it would solve?

— Needs to be a mom

DEAR NEEDS >> I define a “blended family” as one that encompasse­s ”yours, mine and ours.” What you have is a situation in which you want a child of your own, and your husband is afraid that if you have one, it will distract you from trying to get along better with HIS kids. What I think is that you and your husband should resolve this with a licensed marriage counselor to help you mediate this major difference in your perspectiv­es — if that’s possible.

DEAR ABBY >> I am 55 and have never lived by myself. I married at 19, moving from my parents’ house to live with my husband. We divorced a few years later, and I raised my two kids alone. They are in their 30s now. I did remarry and we were together for 23 years before I filed for divorce.

At the beginning of my separation, I moved in with my daughter and grandson, which benefited us both financiall­y. I’m financiall­y stable now, and so is my daughter. I’m ready to move out on my own,but my daughter says that’s not fair because she wants to finish college and needs my help to get her through this. I’m proud that she works and goes to college full time.

My sister says I should stay because if I leave, my kids may resent me. It’s a hard decision for me, because I wantmy independen­ce and my own life. I have been a caretaker for as long as I can remember. I want to be MY caretaker now — solo.

Am I wrong to want this? Should I stick around another three years until my daughter is finished with college? Am I selfish to want my own life?

— Wantsmy own life

DEARWANTS >> You wrote that you and your daughter are both financiall­y stable at this point. Does she need you to be her resident baby sitter?

At 55, if you want your freedom, and it wouldn’t cause a financial burden on your daughter, you should have the freedom to live the life you want. If, after themove, you would like to contribute child care on an as-needed basis, it would be a loving thing to do. But to maintain the status quo out of fear that you will be resented if you leave strikes me as a poor reason for staying.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www. DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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