Daily News (Los Angeles)

Don't leave affection unspoken

- Columnist Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com.

DEAR ABBY >> My longtime boyfriend passed away after an extended illness, and I'd like to offer a suggestion to your readers I wish I had thought of before his passing.

After the funeral, I was thinking about what a wonderful man he was, so I decided to compile a list of his good qualities. The list grew longer the more I thought about his many positive attributes. They were big and small things, but they all added up to why I loved him so much.

I wish I'd had it framed and given it to him while he was healthy, or at least while he was still living. I know it would have meant the world to him. I hope my suggestion will be adopted by your readers. It could bring so much happiness to the person you love. Do it before it's too late.

— Loved So Much About

Him

DEAR LOVED >> Please accept my sympathy for your loss. Death is particular­ly poignant if there are words left unsaid. I subscribe to your philosophy. That message is eloquently conveyed in a poem included in my “Keepers” booklet. A quick and easy read, “Keepers” is a collection of poems, essays and letters readers have repeatedly asked me to reprint. Many subjects are covered, including children, parenting, animals, aging, death, forgivenes­s and more.

What follows is the poem I mentioned:

“The Time Is Now” (Author Unknown)

If you are ever going to love me,

Love me now, while I can know

The sweet and tender feelings

Which from true affection flow.

Love me now

While I am living.

Do not wait until I'm gone

And then have it chiseled in marble, Sweet words on ice-cold stone.

If you have tender thoughts of me,

Please tell me now.

If you wait until I am sleeping,

Never to awaken,

There will be death between us

And I won't hear you then.

So, if you love me, even a little bit,

Let me know it while I am living

So I can treasure it.

DEAR ABBY >> If I'm with a close friend and she has a prominent hair on her face, should I say anything? I appreciate it when someone brings something like that to my attention.

— Helpful in Virginia

DEAR HELPFUL >> Of COURSE you should say something — privately. A true friend should not only tell her but also share a pair of tweezers and a pocket mirror from your makeup bag with her.

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