Relationship drama ruins friend’s trip

Dear Harriette: My best friend goes to college in Europe and always spends his holidays over there with his family. Due to this, I get to see him for only two weeks in the winter when he comes home. We planned a trip this summer to go backpacking across Europe with his parents and little brother, but after a messy breakup with his girlfriend, he rushed into a new relationship and the plans completely changed. Instead of our original trip, we went to stay at his new girlfriend’s house in Portugal with three of her friends. I wasn’t entirely opposed to the idea, but I was upset that I wouldn’t get as much time to see him as we planned.

On the first day, his girlfriend got in a fight with her friends, and the friends all left, so I became the third wheel. It was extremely awkward since I’m good friends with his ex. I ended up getting a hotel room instead of sleeping on the new girlfriend’s floor, andI left three days early.

I really wanted to spend time with my best friend, but his girlfriend kind of ruined it. He asked me to come visit again. How do I tell him that I really don’t want to relive this trip? — Friend Mess

Dear Friend Mess: You landed in the middle of relationship drama. You can’t blame this all on the new girlfriend, though. She and her boyfriend are equally responsible. Sadly, you bore the brunt of their madness. Of course you must talk to your friend — hopefully when his life has calmed down a bit. Tell him that you didn’t appreciate the way he treated you when you visited him. Remind him of what happened specifically and how messy it was. Point out that you are wary of visiting him again until he gets his life in order. No one wants to travel across the world only to be ignored.

Dear Harriette: I just got my paycheck, and I have to pay my rent before I head out to visit my parents in a different state. I planned to pay for everything today, but my debit card got hacked at 5 o’clock this morning. It takes five to seven business days to send me a new card, but

I’ll be leaving in three. Whoever hacked me took a lot of money, so I have to transfer money from savings to pay rent.

I know it is irresponsible not to cancel the card right away, especially with my savings information attached. However, I have to pay for food, my car to the airport and my checked luggage. I can’t lose any more money to fraud, but I also can’t go penniless for days before a trip. What do you suggest I do? — Hacked

Dear Hacked: Go to your bank and speak to an official in person. Since money was taken from your account, if you can prove it, you will not be liable for it. You will get it back. Ask for a temporary emergency card that you can use while you wait for the replacement card to arrive.