Ready to formalize relationship status
Dear Harriette: I’m in a relationship where we’ve mutually agreed to exclusivity, yet we haven’t formalized our relationship status. We value the natural flow of our connection, but I desire more clarity. How can I guide conversations about defining our relationship without putting undue pressure on the organic progression we’ve cherished? — What’s Next
DearWhat’s Next: What do you want for your future? When you think about your life, what do you see, and do you see that potentially with this partner?
Now is the time to talk to your partner about your vision of your future and ask about theirs. Too often, people drift together without clarity. For some people, that’s fine, but often one partner is not as comfortable. That stems from not knowing how you fit into your partner’s dreams for the future.
Time and again, I have seen couples who have different views of the meaning of a relationship. Being monogamous is great, but surely it’s not everything.
What else might one want? To plan a life together? To marry — or at least agree to be in it for the long haul? Some just want to enjoy the moment without boundaries. Some feel the need to be free, while others yearn for the stability of connection.
You may not be ready to propose marriage, but what do you propose? You need to know what that is. Otherwise, your insecurity about the future will remain as a looming weight.
Dear Harriette: As a 20-year-old man with a full-time job in sales, I’m keen on laying a solid financial foundation while having relatively few obligations. Last year, one of my New Year’s resolutions was to improve my financial situation, but I struggled to make significant progress. What realistic steps can I take this year to enhance my financial stability without feeling overwhelmed by the process? Specifically, I’d appreciate advice on establishing good financial habits for the long term, considering my stage in life. — Financial Success
Dear Financial Success: The best advice I have ever received about becoming financially fit is to spend within your means. If you want to build wealth, start by spending less than you earn.
Simple, but profound — and not always easy to do — but that alone can help create financial stability.
By literally doing the basics, you can turn your finances around. Pay your bills on time. Do your best not to get into debt by overusing credit cards. Cut back on all unnecessary expenses. Create a budget and stick to it. Review it weekly to ensure that you are on track. Don’t get derailed by trying to keep up with your friends. Be frugal and consistent, and engage a financial planner who can help you map out an investment strategy to make the most out of the money you’ve got.