Daily Press

After breakup, woman unsure of future

- Send questions to askharriet­te@harriettec­ole. com or c/o Andrew McMeel Syndicatio­n, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106

Dear Harriette: I never thought I’d find myself in this situation, but here I am. Recently, I was dumped by my long-term boyfriend, and I’m feeling lost and embarrasse­d. We’ve been together for nearly a decade, and the sudden end of our relationsh­ip has left me completely unsure of what to do next. I’m 30 years old, and it feels like I’m starting over in so many aspects of my life. The pain is overwhelmi­ng, and I’m not sure how to deal with the heartbreak. The thought of facing the world as a single woman in my 30s is both intimidati­ng and daunting. How do I cope, and where do I even begin to rebuild my life? — Dumped

Take a deep breath. It’s time to

Dear Dumped:

regroup. As daunting as it seems today, at least you are free of this relationsh­ip at a point when you still have a full life ahead of you. Look at this as a fresh start. Take a minute to determine what type of relationsh­ip you are looking for. What qualities do you want in a partner? Then get out there and meet new people. Do you have single friends? Perhaps you can go out with some of them.

Definitely invest in a therapist who can help you get over the negative feelings you may have about yourself and your past so that you are completely available for what’s next in your life.

Dear Harriette: I believe I may be a part of the LGBTQ+ community, but I am hesitant to embrace this aspect of my identity due to the lack of acceptance from those around me. The thought of not being accepted for who I am is causing me distress and uncertaint­y.

I yearn to live authentica­lly and be accepted for who I am, but the fear of rejection is holding me back.

Any guidance or support you can offer on embracing my identity and dealing with the reactions of those who may not understand or accept me would be greatly appreciate­d. — Identity Crisis

You owe it to yourself to figure out who you are and who and how you love. That does not mean that there won’t be people who will criticize you and possibly go out of their way to make

Dear Identity Crisis:

you feel uncomforta­ble.

Before you wage that war, focus on your life and explore your identity. Look around in your area to see where people from the LGBTQ+ community gather. Put yourself in that environmen­t so that you can meet like-minded people. Take your time to meet people and build friendship­s with them.

If you feel unsafe, consider moving to an area that is more welcoming. You can live the life that reflects who you are. It may take a few strategic steps to make that happen, but don’t give up stepping into the fullness of who you are, whomever that is.

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