How can I help depressed sibling?
Q: My brother has been diagnosed with depression. I want to help him, but I do not know what to do. Can you give me ideas for how to support him? A:
When a loved one is affected by depression, it can be difficult to understand what you can do to help. Clinical depression is a complex and individualized process. Gaining perspective on what your brother is experiencing can be critical to the support process. Visualizing depression as a downward spiral is one way to simplify depression.
The downward spiral may begin with the person feeling worse than usual from physical, social or psychological stressors. A worsened mood may lead to taking part in fewer meaningful day-to-day activities. Self-criticism and stress increase due to mounting responsibilities.
As the spiral develops, a complex dynamic emerges. Your loved one becomes increasingly stressed while simultaneously less capable of coping with the everyday. The response of the brain to this dynamic is to slow, stop and depress. A person can become depressed for months or even years.
People who spiral down can bounce back. But depression affects the energy needed to return to baseline. You can help and support them in their journey. Here are some suggestions.
SYMPTOMS
Depression signs and symptoms can include:
Feelings of sadness, emptiness or hopelessness.
Angry outbursts or irritability.
Loss of interest or pleasure in activities.
Insomnia or sleeping too much.
Tiredness and lack of energy.
Reduced appetite and weight loss or increased cravings for food and weight gain.
Anxiety, agitation or restlessness.
Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements
Feelings of worthlessness or guilt.
Difficulty concentrating, making decisions or recalling information.
Frequent or recurrent mention of death, suicidal thoughts or attempts.
Clinical depression does not require profound sadness. Rather, it can be a lack of positive emotion.
TREATMENT
People with depression may not recognize their symptoms. They may have difficulty seeing the point of treatment. This is where you can be most helpful.
Consider talking to your brother about what you’ve noticed and why you’re concerned. Explain that depression is a complex condition — not a personal weakness — and that effective treatment exists. Suggest seeking help from a mental health professional.
SUPPORT
Here are some other ways to help.
to take prescribed medications and keep appointments.
Help them
When they want to talk, listen with intent. Avoid being judgmental.
Give positive reinforcement. Remind them about their positive qualities and how much they mean to you and others.
Help establish a routine. Someone who’s depressed can benefit from having a routine or structure. This is because it can be difficult for a person with depression to make spontaneous healthy choices. Offer to make a schedule for meals, medication, physical activity, sleep, outside time and household chores.
Make plans together. Invite your loved one on a walk, to see a movie or work together on a hobby.
Part of the challenge of supporting someone with depression is witnessing their struggle and knowing you cannot complete the path for them. Frustration, helplessness or anger are natural responses. Practice acceptance and cope by prioritizing your own mental health. Devote time for hobbies, meaningful experiences and other relationships.