Why an accurate profile on dating sites is better than an interesting one
As anyone who has tried it knows, online dating can have its fair share of challenges ... and it all starts with writing your profile. And as someone who has read thousands of bios over the years, believe me when I say that many (very many) people are going about it incorrectly.
Sure, there are the common mistakes: lazy profiles that someone clearly put zero effort into, making off-putting spelling mistakes, or ranting about all the things they do NOT like and are NOT looking for in a partner (for the record: please keep the negativity out of your bio). But another pitfall in profile writing is creating something you think will make people swipe right rather than an accurate representation of yourself.
Maybe you’ve experienced this yourself. Someone on Bumble or Hinge writes about how they love to travel, hike, go out to eat and see concerts. But when you get to know them, you find out that they actually spend most of their time binge-watching Netflix. And while there’s nothing inherently wrong with that, it’s not what made you want to get to know them. (This can also go the complete opposite way — someone might hint that they’re a homebody, but you come to find out they’re actually someone who goes out with friends until 4 a.m. every weekend.)
Even if you’re not outright lying or presenting an exaggerated version of yourself, it’s important not to write a profile just because you think it makes you sound interesting. Because the key word here is “think” — in reality, you have no idea what your match is looking for — everyone is different. But one thing is for sure: If you don’t describe yourself accurately in your bio, you’re setting your match up for disappointment ... and consequently, yourself.
People might be tempted to leave the quirkier parts of their personality out of their profile. But these are the kinds of things that make your profile stand out from the crowd. Who knows? You might connect with someone on playing the same little-known video game, having a thing for French pop music or dressing up in matching PJs with your dog every Christmas. Or if someone is unfamiliar with some of your hobbies, it’s the perfect chance for them to send you an opening message to ask about it.
Not sure if your profile is a good representation of yourself? Ask a trusted friend to give it a read and ask if it sounds like you. They’ll let you know.