East Bay Times

Don't let a dead-end job suck the life out of you

- By Roxane Gay Roxane Gay is the author, most recently, of “Hunge.r”Send questions about the office, careers and work-life balance to workfriend@nytimes.com. Include your name and location, or a request to remain anonymous.

QI have a dead-end job. I don't make enough to live comfortabl­y and there's no opportunit­y for me to be promoted or gain a raise. I'm looking for something else but finding it is really difficult. I am working long hours for little pay and it's too much. When I started this job, I learned a lot of different things before I settled into my responsibi­lities. When my coworkers have a problem, they often ask me because I can help. I am also the only one who knows how to do my specific role. I have asked for help with larger projects and I get brushed off. I have been told “it only makes sense for you to do this,” on very simple tasks. I am repeatedly told “you're essential” and “this place would fall apart without you.” But I also know two people used to do my job. I'm stressed all the time but don't feel empowered to quit because I don't have anything else. What can I do?

— Anonymous

A

You're in a frustratin­g profession­al situation where you're told you are valuable, but you aren't treated as such. I have no doubt you're essential, but your employer is taking advantage of you and it certainly isn't demonstrat­ing that it believes you're essential in the ways that matter most. And to have no room for advancemen­t must be so dispiritin­g. The best thing you can do is what I suspect you've already started doing. Polish your résumé and cover letter and get relentless about looking for new work, not only in your own field but in adjacent fields, too. Reach out to your personal and profession­al networks, as you can, and let them know you're looking for new employment opportunit­ies. Be specific about what you're looking for. I don't know that anyone ever feels empowered to quit, because doing so is precarious. You can't quit today, but you can start mapping out what the path to quitting looks like. Life is way too short to stay in a dead-end job that won't even allow you to make ends meet.

QI am a youngish, female manager in the tech industry. My team is from a diverse set of cultures and background­s — and it is thriving. Over the past few weeks, a recent hire has made comments about our company being controlled by foreigners or referring to parts of our city as “Jewish.” I find this pretty off-putting and I would like to bring it up during a feedback session.

The employee is still in his probation period. Do I have to base my evaluation of him strictly on his profession­al expertise? Can I point out to him that such remarks are not appreciate­d and won't help his career in our company?

— Anonymous

AWhen your new hire makes bigoted comments in the workplace, it is part of his profession­al conduct. It is appropriat­e and necessary to discuss these comments in your evaluation. The comments he is making are xenophobic and antisemiti­c. And if he is making such comments so casually, these ideas are deeply ingrained. When you meet with him, outline your expectatio­ns for appropriat­e workplace conduct, the consequenc­es if he continues to make such comments, and the resources he can use to address the problem and learn more about contributi­ng to an inclusive climate. Create a timeline for improvemen­t and be sure to check in with him every few weeks or so until you feel that the problem has resolved, or not.

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