Mom wants sup­port in let­ting teens go to con­cert

The Saline Courier - - OPINION -

“Congress shall make no law ... abridg­ing the free­dom of speech, or of the press ... . ” — From the First Amend­ment to Con­sti­tu­tion

DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage daugh­ter wants to go to a rap con­cert with her friends. She is so ex­cited about the pos­si­bil­ity. She and her friends lis­ten to the artist all the time. I al­lowed her to go to another big con­cert this sum­mer with friends, and she did well. I told her she can go this time if she has a buddy who agrees to stay with her dur­ing the whole con­cert. If they buddy up and fol­low the ba­sic direc­tions that we have given them their whole lives, I an­tic­i­pate they will be fine. Th­ese con­certs have lots of se­cu­rity.

Once I got com­fort­able with the idea, I dis­cov­ered that her friend’s mom is ner­vous and doesn’t want to let her daugh­ter go. I be­lieve that we can’t pro­tect our chil­dren from ev­ery­thing, and I do think we can let them go as long as they make smart choices. What should I say to this mom? -- Let Them Go

DEAR LET THEM GO: You have en­tered the phase of par­ent­ing teenagers where you will con­stantly be eval­u­at­ing free­dom ver­sus safety. Every par­ent wants to pro­tect their child from po­ten­tial harm. Go­ing to a large con­cert has its chal­lenges. The very na­ture of a large crowd is at the top of the list. Go through your check­list of pre­cau­tions with the other par­ent and ex­plain that you be­lieve that if your daugh­ters fol­low them, they will be as safe as pos­si­ble. Share your per­spec­tive, mak­ing it clear that you do not have a crys­tal ball, but you trust your daugh­ter and want to give her this op­por­tu­nity.

You might also ask your daugh­ter to think of another friend who may want to go with her. You should not pres­sure this mother too much. State your case and move on, if nec­es­sary. For your peace of mind, you want your teen to go with another per­son who shares your val­ues and whose par­ent is on board.


DEAR HARRIETTE: I am hav­ing a hard time keep­ing track of all of my re­spon­si­bil­i­ties. I used to have an as­sis­tant, but I had to let him go; I don’t have the bud­get to sup­port an em­ployee any­more.

For most of my ca­reer I have had ad­min­is­tra­tive help. I’m cre­ative, and I have needed sup­port to keep all of the de­tails in place. Now that I am alone, I have been miss­ing ap­point­ments and fail­ing to stay on top of some of the most im­por­tant de­tails of my busi­ness. I know this sounds pa­thetic, but it’s true. What do you rec­om­mend that I do to get it to­gether? -- Fall­ing Apart

DEAR FALL­ING APART: It can be chal­leng­ing to change your work style and keep an even flow, es­pe­cially if you are ac­cus­tomed to hav­ing ad­min­is­tra­tive sup­port. If you have any bud­get at all, you may con­sider hir­ing a vir­tual as­sis­tant for an hour or so a day. Many peo­ple work re­motely and of­fer fo­cused en­gage­ment for clients so that you get sup­port with­out hav­ing to pay a full-time salary.

You can also look into ad­min­is­tra­tive soft­ware that can sup­port your ef­forts to stay on top of your work. Smart­phones have many fea­tures that can help you keep track of your re­spon­si­bil­i­ties. There are ways that you can get the help you need at a price you can af­ford! •••

Harriette Cole is a lifestylis­t and founder of DREAMLEAPE­RS, an ini­tia­tive to help peo­ple ac­cess and ac­ti­vate their dreams. You can send ques­tions to askhar­ri­[email protected]­ri­et­ or c/o An­drews Mcmeel Syn­di­ca­tion, 1130 Wal­nut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.


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