TO ESCAPE A HATER
Issue a hard “no”
You know who to call when you need to be taken down a few notches. “There are many reasons we keep people in our lives who tear us down or are competitive with us in a negative way,” says Susan Forward, Ph.D., coauthor of Emotional Blackmail. “But it’s important to stop rationalizing that she’s only behaving that way because she’s stressed or upset.” If her behavior compromises your dignity, there are no excuses.
“Your heart will be pounding, your palms will be sweating, but next time she dishes it out, garner your courage and say, ‘It’s not okay to talk to me that way,’” encourages Forward. “Say, ‘I’ll give you a chance to change this behavior, but failing that, I’m going to have to do some separating from you for my well-being.’” Pay attention to how you talk to yourself too: “Negative self-talk like, I won’t have any friends if I end this relationship, keeps you from getting to a healthier place of
I don’t need her approval.”