EARTH TO LUANN: QUIT BEING A BOOZY FLOOZY!
FIRST, the good news:
Reality babe Countess
Luann de Lesseps hasn’t been knocking back waterfalls of booze during her coronavirus lockdown.
Now the bad: Fat chance of it lasting very long.
Even after two years of legal troubles due to her love of hooch, the twice-divorced aristocrat wannabe — she got the title from her first hubby, a fancy French dude — can shockingly be seen drinking along with her co-stars on this season’s The Real Housewives of New York City.
She admitted in January, “I’m drinking,” but insisted: “I’m drinking socially and responsibly.”
Now months later, she swears she’s been sober while in lockdown with her 26-year-old daughter, Victoria, saying: “We’re kind of not drinking together.”
“Kind of”? That’s not exactly taking the pledge.
And it’s gotta be worrying to her fans — because drinking turned Luann’s ritzy life into a tippling train wreck!
On Dec. 24, 2017, the drunkas-a-skunk blueblood was found romping with a guy in a ritzy Palm Beach hotel bedroom that wasn’t theirs — and she refused to leave!
According to RadarOnline, cops then arrived — and the firewater-fueled beauty bloodied an officer by slamming a door in his face! Meanwhile, she kicked and screamed, telling the cops, “I’m going to f***ing kill you!”
Doesn’t sound very uppercrusty, does it?
Days later, the humiliated lush checked into rehab and then beat jail time with a deal to plead guilty to battery, trespassing and disorderly intoxication.
The judge then put her on a year’s probation containing an order not to drink — but that command was busted in the spring of 2019 when she confessed to downing two mimosas following a cabaret stint. It turned out she was also ducking alcohol recovery meetings and sobriety tests, which were also part of the agreement.
The lucky gal avoided the slammer again when the kindhearted judge gave her stricter rules — ones she appeared to obey, leading to her completing probation last August.
But while she says she’s gone sober on lockdown, she’s said she WILL “drink socially” again.
And that’s bad because she’s admitted she’s a lush.
“I can’t be like most normal people and have a glass or two of wine,” she’s blabbed. “I will drink the whole bottle and then go looking where can I get another bottle.”
We say: Please, Luann, quit cold turkey — or there’s a barrel of trouble ahead!