Double duck

When I watched today’s deal in a penny game, East was Grapefruit, our club member whose gruff exterior conceals an even gruffer interior. He berates his partners mercilessly. His jump to four clubs was preemptive. South had plenty enough to bid four spades anyway, and West judged to double.

Grapefruit won the first club with the king and led the ace. South ruffed and knew that West must have a stack in trumps for his double. So at the third trick, South led a low trump. (No doubt he hoped trumps weren’t breaking 5-0.)

West won with the nine and couldn’t gain by leading a third club; dummy could ruff, letting South preserve his own length in trumps. So West shifted to a low heart: six, queen, ace. South then led another low trump.

West won and led the jack of hearts; another club lead was still futile. South won and drew West’s remaining trumps with the A-K. He ran the diamonds to discard his low hearts, making the doubled contract, and Grapefruit went wild.

“Partner, you couldn’t pour water out of a boot if there were instructions on the heel. Did you think my jump to four clubs promised any defense?”

“My double was fine,” West said, straining to control himself.

Grapefruit told the kibitzers that West was a few feathers shy of a whole duck.

South played well, but EastWest could have prevailed. If Grapefruit shifts to a heart at Trick Two, the defense has time to set up a heart trick before declarer can draw trumps and run the diamonds. Nobody dared inform Grapefruit of that, of course.