In a time of crises, there is still beauty to be found
In 2012, after my openheart surgery, one doctor used a phrase that made no sense to me. He looked at my chest and said, “What a beautiful scar!”
Eight years later, with good health, successful recovery and the great gift of time, that phrase makes sense. Someone sliced me open, but they also put me back together. Someone destroyed my bare-chested, pumping iron TV-commercial dream career just to save (or at least significantly extend) my life. That’s beautiful.
The memory makes me wonder if, as a people — now that this pandemic, financial crisis and social unrest have sliced open our lives — will we transform what is today a scar into something of beauty?
Many people are now creating beauty. My favorite might be Tom Moore, the 100-year-old World
War II veteran who announced he would walk laps in his yard to raise money for Britain’s medical workers. He raised nearly $40 million. Mother Earth is also producing beauty. The International Energy Agency says global greenhouse gas emissions are on track to fall 8% this year. That would be the largest drop ever recorded. In response to the horror of
George Floyd’s death, tens of thousands are marching in city streets across the nation and world, and maybe — maybe — we’ve finally reached the tipping point for guaranteeing that black lives matter.
Will we look back on this time and see a scar, or will we take action now to produce good from bad? Will we learn important lessons? Will we follow through on what we learn? We’re so divided, will we even agree on what we learn?
On April 15, State Representative Christine Palm listed seven ways we can come out of this crisis stronger. She talked about real rewards for front line workers, fixing the wealth gap, dealing with climate change, strengthening the health care system and more. Are we listening and debating and planning?
Last month, Bernard Kavaler wrote that the overriding emotion of this time might be (wait for it) gratitude. Gratitude for health care workers, grocery clerks, garbage men and volunteers of all kinds. Jack Kitching, a white man in America like me, recently told us to listen to black people and support black people however they need support.
Like Mr. Kavaler, I’m seeing a flow of selflessness, empathy and generosity. Love is trying to wrestle hate to the mat.
We can choose to hate, blame, belittle, divide, shame, judge and condemn whoever we think is at fault. “The Chinese did this to the world!” “Our government screwed up big time.” “The media and the left blew this way out of proportion and filled the world with fear.” All this strikes me as counterproductive and draining.
Hate and blame sap energy. Martin Luther King Jr. said it well: “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.”
If we want change, if we want to learn, if we want progress, we need to put our thoughts, energy and action into love. That’s what Tom Moore did. That’s what actor John Krasinski does with his “Some Good News” videos. That’s what the Hartford Foundation for Public Giving did with its $3 million coronavirus relief fund.
A reporter once asked Mother Teresa if she felt badly because she’d spent so many years trying to help the destitute in Calcutta and there were just as many people dying and suffering as when she started. Hadn’t she let God down? Mother Teresa replied, “God has not called me to be successful. He has called me to be faithful.” God, the universe, your belief system asks the same of you and me. You don’t have to save the world. Just use your positive energy to do what you can.
Sometimes I want to give up. I can’t raise $40 million like Tom Moore. I can’t get thousands of people to feel hope and be encouraged by watching good news stories. I can’t stop violence against African Americans. I struggle to not hate, not condemn those I think are criminally wrong and morally bankrupt. But solutions to racism and milliondollar donations are not mine (and probably not yours) to give. Yet we can do those small things that make a big difference in people’s lives.
Shop for that homebound neighbor. Cook a meal for the local shelter. Contact legislators if you support their ideas and offer your help. Skip the hate and blame and deliver the hope and support.
Stand with and support the person who’s being berated or treated with no respect.
Lying in a hospital bed for 10 days in 2012, I appreciated the great care from so many in the medical field. But one person stood out. He was an aide. When my phone rang late at night and woke me up, he made sure that never happened again. It was a small thing. But there are no small things. He moved a scary, ugly time in the direction of a beautiful scar.