As climate changes, gardeners need own hardiness zone map
Nothing raises the spirits of a gardener more than the release of the new year’s seed packets. For some, that’s all they’ll ever raise. But every spring, seeds of hope grow into flowers and vegetables of joy in a gardener’s head, replacing the weeds and assorted varmints that took up residence there in the previous season. It is a transformation that mostly reveals the limits of a gardener’s memory.
For many years, it was also a transformation that would not be possible were it not for the little plant hardiness zone map on the back of the seed packets that shows gardeners where those seeds can be safely planted. In a perfect world, this hardiness map would not be necessary, but it’s a sad fact of gardening that most gardeners are born with bougainvillea dreams in a pachysandra climate. Stay in your zone, the map seems to say, and everything will be all right. Of course, anyone who actually hears it say this should probably either cut back on the liquid fertilizer, or stop believing in a perfect world.
Anyone who even believes in a safe zone these days is living in a dream world, and should probably resort to more drastic measures to remove the weeds and varmints from their heads. The climate is changing, and those seeds of hope are changing their zones faster than the fossil fuel industry can change the narrative.
Recently, the U.S. Department of Agriculture, or U.S.D.A., shocked the gardening world by revising the plant hardiness zone map of the U.S. Only the plants were not surprised. The new map shows that most regions have moved a half zone, or 2.5 degrees Fahrenheit, warmer. I moved from zone 6a to zone 6b myself, and am now so close to zone 7 that I can practically see the climate change deniers tripping over the kudzu as they run from the reality that’s taking us ever closer to the Twilight Zone. Not even their imaginations can grow in that zone.
Devastating droughts, Biblical floods, megafires, extreme heat events, an ominous sea level rise, and enough ungodly storms to make an Act of God look like a disappearing act are the norm now. The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration even has a billion dollar disaster mapping tool that makes the U.S.D.A.’s hardiness map look like a disaster zone. Carbon emissions are still rising, and scientists recently reported that Earth briefly passed the dreaded milestone of having an average global temperature that is more than two degrees Celsius above pre industrial levels. Not to be outdone, politicians have called for a curb on scientist emissions.
It’s getting so you can’t find a zone where humans can grow safely anymore. Or a home insurance policy you can afford. Even Las Vegas oddsmakers will take your bet on the chance of tornadoes in Maine, hurricanes in Nevada, or humans on Earth. Which is why I think it’s past time for a Gardener Hardiness Zone Map. One that doesn’t make gardeners feel like they’ll need the Federal Emergency Management Act to intervene every year they plant a garden. In the meantime, I wonder how many of us could cram into Montana?
Gardeners have not been this worried since the Sun Gods and the Rain Gods demanded sacrifices to prevent droughts and floods from destroying the first gardens. Those early civilizations sacrificed a lot to keep people fed. What is modern civilization prepared to sacrifice?