Blessings from salesclerks rub customer wrongway
Dear Abby:
Several salespersons recently have ended our transaction by saying, “Have a blessed day.” The last two times it happened, I stopped and asked, “What do you mean by that?” Both of them stammered and didn’t know what to say.
One said, “I’msort of religious.” I replied that I’matheist. I don’t think these folks realize what they’re saying. The next time it happens, I plan to respond by asking Zeus to bestow blessings upon them as well.
Why do people feel they have a right to force their religious beliefs on customers?
Dear Annoyed Atheist:
I seriously doubt they are trying to proselytize. The expression may be regional. Or the person may feel that “blessed” is synonymous with “good,” “happy” or “safe.” If you wish to invoke the blessings of Zeus upon them, feel free to do so. But don’t be surprised if you have a heck of a time getting waited on the next time you visit the establishment.
Dear Abby:
I have been in a relationship with “Ward” for two years. I love him and everything is great except for one thing. He refuses to compromise when it comes to his family functions.
He’s very close to his extended family, and every time there’s an event like a recent graduation party for a cousin, he never wants to leave. We were there for 10 hours, and I spent more than half of it either alone or talking to someone I didn’t know well becauseWard had ditchedme.
I have spoken to him about this, but he’s unwilling to compromise. He says his family knows him as “the social guy” and expects him to stay late and be the life of the party. It’s getting old that he makesme feel like the bad guy or a party- pooper when I want to leave.
We have had big fights over this. I’mnot sure what to do. This has caused a rift in our relationship.
Dear Functioned Out:
When the next family function rolls around, go in separate cars. That way you can leave when you get tired, andWard can stay as long as he wants. No harm, no foul, no fights.
Dear Abby:
I marriedmy high school sweetheart at the age of 24. Five years later we divorced. My current husband, “Gil,” had a similar short first marriage.
Although Gil and I have chosen not to divulge any information to our two children about our previousmarriages, my sister thinks we should tell them because theymay find out later in life and be disappointed they didn’t hear it from us. She has said we are being dishonest. That is certainly not our intention. We truly believe there’s no reason to bring up a past that has no benefit in their lives.
Your advice is badly needed because I seemy relationship withmy sister spiraling in a downward direction. I love her, but I don’t agree with her opinion.
Dear Lives:
I see no reason to make a “grand announcement” to your children, but with the rate at whichmarriages fail in this country, I also see no reason to keep this a deep, dark secret. If the subject of what makes a successfulmarriage comes up when your children are old enough, and you think it could be helpful to them, youmight be able to impart some important life lessons if youmention the past. Having been married once previously isn’t a shameful secret, and it should not be treated like one.
Dear Abby:
I have knownmy boyfriend, “Kyle,” for eight years. We have been datingmore than two years and living together for sevenmonths. We have an amazing relationship. We love to laugh and make each other laugh. That’s a “quirk” we share.
This morning, Kyle woke up, went straight to his dad’s house without saying why and returned with his hair cut, beard trimmed and looking well- groomed. He seemed kind of “off,” though— almost nervous. He then went to hismom’s to help with some yard work and when he came home, he snuck up behindme and slipped a ring onmy finger. I got a little tearyeyed and asked where it came from. He said from hismom. He acted shy, wouldn’t saymuch or look right at me. Then, after a moment, he shouted, “Just kidding! I wanted to make you laugh and freak you out a little.”
I don’t think there was malicious intent on his part. He’s a sweetheart, but I don’t know how to tell him how badly he hurt me emotionally. I thought he was proposing. What should I do?
Dear Unengaged:
Sit Kyle down and tell him the effect his “joke” had on you. After a couple has started living together, a proposal of marriage is no laughing matter unless both partners are in on the joke.
If you talk to him, you may find that he did propose, but then got cold feet.