Caught up in Madness
Defending champ Villanova ousted from NCAA tourney.
Isn’t this fun? Tony Romo, Rick Smith and the Texans sitting around, waiting on Jerry Jones to pick up the phone, or at least twiddle his thumbs.
Talk radio stuck in limbo — or hell — for weeks, depending on how high your tolerance for endless Romo mumbo jumbo reaches. National TV football shows sinking even lower, with constant “Tony and Jerry” coverage beamed in live from Houston and Dallas — despite the fact that absolutely nothing has happened and old No. 9 is stuck in that forbidden city to the north.
Twelve days after free-agency madness unofficially began and 10 days after the initial insane lottery numbers started rolling in again, the Texans haven’t signed a soul and are stuck idly waiting on Romo. (Re-signing a punter, kicker and backup tight end doesn’t count.)
I’ve written and you’ve seethed about the Texans’ endless search for a franchise quarterback enough for right now. So let’s examine a couple of larger interconnected questions while the Romo clock keeps on slowly ticking.
Why are we even talking about Romo in 2017?
And why can’t the NFL find new QBs worth keeping around?
Romo, 36, leading the Texans in Bill O’Brien’s make-or-break fourth season could be pure genius or an absolute disaster. Bob McNair’s franchise is that desperate for a double-digit win solution (see: Brock Osweiler, $72 million, playoff win, Cleveland), and it actually makes perfect sense that a team leading the NFL in starting QBs since 2014 (eight) would now be at a total standstill until Romo is magically released from Jones’ castle.
The NFL’s problem is much more troubling and complex.
To say they just don’t make them like they used to would be an enormous understatement. Because they pretty much don’t make them anymore.
The Texans are far from the only team in the league that can’t find a lasting QB. Those that have them rarely, if ever, let them go. New England is sitting on two (ageless wonder Tom Brady; invaluable, little-seen backup Jimmy Garoppolo).
Those that lack a solution draft, sign and trade in vain, with everyone from San Francisco and Chicago to the New York Jets and Browns mirroring the Texans’ frustrating path in recent seasons.
Good money chases bad
It was in vogue to freak out about Mike Glennon’s ridiculous three-year, $43.5 million payday at the height of the recent free-agent frenzy. But the Bears were coming off eight mostly pointless years under Jay “I Don’t Care” Cutler and are staring at the same QB draft board we’re all seeing.
A couple of intriguing names and a bunch of nobodies. Another year where ever-evolving college offenses — up tempo, spread out, wide open — fail to match up with the pro systems they are supposed to be feeding.
Yes, we can blame the Texans for their faults and misses. Sure, the NFL is ultimately Darwinism between the lines — you either have a QB who carries you or get devoured by the same names every year.
But how many true franchise quarterbacks are in the league right now? And how many of those actually could put together a Super Bowl season if Week 1 started Monday?
Brady. Matt Ryan. Aaron Rodgers. Ben Roethlisberger.
There’s a clear second tier that’s older than Romo (Drew Brees, 38), older than you think (like Dallas’ hostage No. 9, Eli Manning is also 36) or again has something to prove in 2017 (Russell Wilson, Andrew Luck, Matthew Stafford, Andy Dalton, Joe Flacco).
A promising collection of youth (Derek Carr, Marcus Mariota, Dak Prescott, Jameis Winston, Carson Wentz) has won a combined zero playoff games.
Then an underrated game-manager Kansas City could always move on from in Alex Smith, and Philip Rivers at 35 is in Year 14. That’s about it.
Osweiler was easily one of the worst QBs in the league last year and next-tolast in passer rating (72.2). Cam Newton (75.8) was one spot ahead of the QB the Texans just shipped to Cleveland, telling you just how hard a quarterback’s life has become in the pass-first NFL.
Brian Hoyer, tossed away by O’Brien a year ago and on his seventh team, could be the 49ers’ starter this season. Ex-Texans castoff Ryan Mallett just received $2 million to hopefully never play in Baltimore.
Jared Goff, the No. 1 pick in 2016, was a first-year flop in Los Angeles and initially backed up former Texan Case Keenum.
Another weak draft class
This year’s QB class is even less inspiring. The Texans have to take someone. But no one — Mitchell Trubisky, Deshaun Watson, DeShone Kizer, Patrick Mahomes — is viewed as a Week 1 starter and your draft-obsessed neighbor would struggle to publicly name the second level of professional maybes (Nathan Peterman, Brad Kaaya, Jerod Evans).
No wonder one particular TV sports channel devotes so much wasted air time to useless Kirk Cousins and Romo chatter. No wonder John Elway — who was about $8 million away from overpaying Osweiler last year — has Paxton Lynch and Trevor Siemian on the same roster, and he could end up with the aging QB that Jones’ Cowboys refuse to let go of.
Until the NFL adapts to the new college game, the professional QB crisis will go on. And the Texans aren’t the only team that can’t find an answer.