Coping with a difficult boss: The dangers of doing nothing
Most people cope with difficult bosses by doing nothing. The most common reason for doing nothing are fear and laziness, sometimes a combination of both. Fear of the unknown prompts you to hang back and let life run its course.
Some justify inertia by taking a fatalistic stance — “Maybe this is the way it’s supposed to be. No one said life is easy.”
Organizational psychologists warn against doing nothing. Mardy Grothe and Peter Wylie, authors of
Problem Bosses, say that doing nothing almost always leads to nothing. In most cases it’s self-defeating.
According to Grothe and Wylie, doing nothing takes one of the following four forms.
1. Complaining and commiserating. Although everyone complains and commiserates at times, this strategy will ultimately fail you. Complainers whine about their bosses to anyone who listens. They’ll complain to coworkers, friends and family.
All in all, complaining achieves nothing but alienate the person their complaining to. Who wants to listen to someone complaining all day?
2. Goofing off . Typically, this pattern of behavior happens slowly. You figure, “Why kill myself for an incompetent jerk who doesn’t appreciate me and makes my life miserable?”
Not only is this strategy fruitless, but it could also get you in trouble, warn Grothe and Wylie. Unless your boss is a moron, sooner or later they are going to catch on. In most work areas, productivity is easy to measure.
3. Beating yourself up (or turning the problem inward). Grothe and Wylie call this “internalizing” because you are turning the problem inward, or back on yourself. In this case the problem is more subtle yet still is very destructive. Rather than complaining, commiserating or slacking off on your job, you turn your anger inward until it eats at you, causing the debilitating discomfort in the form of depression, ulcers and back pain. Internalizing is a fruitless method of doing nothing that can cause serious mental and physical discomfort.
4. Escaping. Lastly, many workers resort to drugs and alcohol as a way of escaping a difficult boss. Many people don’t admit it until their work has deteriorated to a dangerous level or they’re on the brink of being fired. Alcohol and drugs are common escape valves for workers in many difficult jobs, but especially those in high-stress ones. Drowning your sorrows in alcohol or drugs brings short-term relief when dealing with fierce deadlines, highly exacting work, and a loathsome boss.
When doing nothing makes sense
At times, doing nothing is a sound strategy. Grothe and Wylie mention the following classic situations: when either you or your boss plans to retire, quit, or transfer to another job.
Imagine you’ve been with a company for 25 years. Through a merger or consolidation, you’ve inherited a boss from hell. That’s the bad news. The good news is you’re only eight months away from retirement, which equates to leaving the company with a full pension and a severance package.
Or perhaps you’re biding your time because there’s a better job in the wings.
If the situation is reversed and your boss is about to retire or take a new job, it’s the same story. Just grin and bear it until the bane of your workday existence makes their final exit.