CAUGHT IN THE WEB
I counted five Deshaun Watson jerseys along a sleepy Kirby Drive two hours before kickoff.
Watson’s famous/infamous
No. 4 outnumbered J.J. Watt’s old No. 99 and Tom Brady’s new No. 12 on a night when the best quarterback of all time and the reigning Super Bowl champs took the field inside a stadium that Watson once owned.
It was the Texans’ third preseason game of 2021. And Watson “news” dominated Saturday for the Texans.
It was David Culley’s final warmup before things really get real for a first-year head coach who will soon have Texans losses (and wins) officially attached to his professional name. And Tampa Bay vs. the Texans inside NRG Stadium was nothing when compared to a national report that there was “mounting chatter that Watson will be traded in the coming days.”
Pro Football Talk reported the above — and posted three separate Watson stories within a four-hour period on Saturday, despite No. 4 being almost invisible inside the Texans’ stadium.
In real life, it was the Tyrod Taylor Show for a rebuilding team badly needing something resembling a franchise face.
Pregame, rookie Davis Mills and 28-year-old journeyman Jeff Driskel took the midfield snaps that Watson once dominated.
Once the preseason minutes ticked down, Brady threw laser darts inside a familiar stadium where 28-3 Atlanta became 34-28 New England in Super Bowl LI.
The only glimpse of the former franchise QB who cried tears of joy after agreeing to a four-year, $156 million contract extension with the Texans on Sept. 5, 2020?
Watson’s No. 4 jersey scattered through the mostly empty stands.
Unless you were checking your phone after receiving another glowing notification teasing another Watson breaking news update.
Some free advice for first-year general manager Nick Caserio: Stay off the internet.
Disable all notifications.
Delete all social media accounts — yes, even TikTok — and strap on your tunnel-vision goggles until the Texans finally move on from D4.
I know, I know. It’s going to be physically and emotionally challenging for the proud ex-Patriot. We all know how friendly, cheery and outgoing Caserio can be, especially with the local media that covers Houston’s NFL team for a living and will collectively outlast his Texans tenure.
But in the best interest of the Texans’ organization — and a fan base that has spent 19-plus seasons far too often suffering through life as depressed Texans fans — it’s time for Caserio to go dark.
Off the grid.
Out of pocket.
Because the internet isn’t going to help Caserio get this right. And because the first-year GM must nail this eventual blockbuster if this era of the Texans has any shot at winning the first AFC Divisional Round playoff game in franchise history during the next five to 10 years.
Caserio, theoretically, is in charge on Kirby and holds the golden key on all roster decisions.
Not Twitter. Not Facebook.
Not Instagram.
Caserio wasn’t a Houston resident in 2020, and he didn’t create this Watson mess. But Caserio will be cemented to this trade. And if he wins it — by getting as much as possible for Watson, who led the NFL in passing last season and is only 25-years-old — the rookie GM will instantly become the most popular GM in Texans history.
Sorry, Charley Casserly. In Caserio We Trust, right? So stay off the worldwide web, Nick. Do what must be done. On your time. And only say “We have a deal” when the Texans are promised all the future firstand second-round picks that must be mailed to Houston in exchange for Watson’s departure.
Point blank: Win this like Bill Belichick would.
Or like a fantasy football champion. Or like Jeff Luhnow used to back in the day when he was rebuilding the Astros.
The Miami Herald reported Saturday afternoon that the Dolphins are intrigued about acquiring Watson but “haven’t been willing to meet Houston’s high asking price amid the uncertainty of (Watson’s) legal situation.”
Yahoo reported that the Dolphins “have emerged as the front-runner in trade discussions with the Texans” for Watson.
The Athletic reported that Carolina is “rolling with Sam Darnold” and the Panthers “aren’t interested” in Watson, although things “could be different down the road.”
It gets confusing, doesn’t it? Modern news is always one text or phone call or instant message away from instantly changing, so it won’t be shocking if Watson is suddenly traded before Week 1. In an ideal world, the rebuilding Texans — who trailed Brady’s Buccaneers 13-0 midway through the second quarter and looked like they will be fortunate to win four real games this season — would move on from Watson as soon as possible and fast-forward whatever their new world order is going to look like.
But Watson’s situation is volatile and unprecedented, while his no-trade clause only complicates the football side of a messy situation.
Caserio was hired to build something big here.
The Watson trade could be the beginning of a bright new era.
The internet isn’t going to help the Texans get this right. Especially in 2021.