The Texican opens his mailbag to answer your questions.
No, seriously, how do I deal with the heat in Houston? I moved here earlier this year and I feel like I have made a grave mistake. I thought it would be a dry heat. John in the Heights
Oh, you think the heat is bad? You merely adopted the heat; I was born in it, molded by it. I didn’t see snow until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but annoying!
But seriously, as a veteran of 36 Houston summers I say you make the best of it and be out in it as much as you can to harden yourself. Any outdoor activity in this sort of heat legally counts as CrossFit or hot yoga. Stop seeing it as some sort of punishment and think of it as nature’s own sauna, releasing toxins from your body free of charge. Some say the heat and humidity even keeps us looking youthful and glowing.
Keep extra shirts handy. Put down a beach towel in your driver’s seat to wick away excess sweat. Carry deodorant with you at all times. Drink plenty of water or White Claw, the Houstonian’s drink of choice this summer
Avoiding cotton underwear is good advice, too. Avoiding underwear is even better advice, but to each their own.
Most important, say a little prayer for those among us that work outside building our roads, houses, or responding to emergencies. They are the real heroes each summer in Houston. You aren’t allowed to complain about the heat if you work in a cold office building. Seriously, there should be a city ordinance against that.
At the time of publication, we are something like 3½ months away from what a Northerner would call true fall weather, so settle in and bake with the rest of us.
Where is a good place to take a Tinder date in Houston? Jonathan in Montrose
This past weekend, while I was celebrating a dear friend’s weekend of wedding festivities (congrats Mark and Rachel!), my friends and I noticed a lot of what appeared to be Tinder and Bumble first dates surrounding us at West Alabama Ice House.
Known in the single-person world sarcastically as “meetand-greets,” we could surmise these were first dates by the forced banter and body language. Does spending an inordinate amount of time talking about your oil and gas job really work?
West Alabama Ice House is a popular online dating venue because, upon further investigation (we actually asked for a show of hands), we discovered that it was a go-to for Inner Loop lonely hearts. The mixture of old and new Montrose culture, simmering in Lone Star and aided by Tacos Tierra Caliente’s barbacoa tacos, seem to make WAIH a chosen proving ground for future mates.
You are close enough to other bars and restaurants if you do in fact hit it off (fingers crossed), and you can always escape a bad meet-and-greet and hit up Whataburger on South Shepherd for a solo drive-thru run to soothe your nerves after an hour wasted on a boring person extolling the virtues of kombucha and Klonopin.
If a person can’t make a great impression while surrounded by random dogs, neighborhood legends and the stray drunken pickup basketball game — all while ingesting little bombs of delicious grease — they probably aren’t for you.
As you know, it is hot in Houston. I recently decided to give religion another try and go back to church. Do I still have to wear a suit and boots when it’s hotter than hell outside? What do you wear on Sunday? Sincerely (and sweaty), Justin in Friendswood It’s funny that you brought up church, as I have also recently returned to the church scene after years of spending my Sunday mornings heating up microwavable breakfast pizzas and deleting my social-media posts from the night before.
The church I attend, Gather Houston, is very relaxed and services are held in a space reserved for art and fashion shows during the week. Most of us are in our 20s and 30s, and it’s nondenominational and very easy-going. Most of the women wear something in between sensible Sunday Funday and a semiformal baby shower in the suburbs. Some guys wear polos, khaki shorts and deck shoes, while others might wear pearl snaps, Levi’s and Vans.
The Texican says to wear whatever you feel like. Come as you are. Not to get too flowery, but don’t let fashion get between you and a spiritual experience. If you want to dress up, dress up. It won’t change the message you hear from the pulpit or how you decipher it for yourself.
God won’t smite you if you wear Converse to Sunday services, but if you wear camo-colored Crocs with white socks, the Big Man might make sure you hit every red light on the way home.