Culley’s team full of no-name jerseys

Nine dollars. Nine dollars?

I just saw a J.J. Watt jersey on sale at a local department store for a measly nine bucks.

Watt used to lead NFL defensive players in jersey sales regularly. Thus, the Texans often had a star player in the top 10 in league popularity. Plus many other players with recognizable names and numbers.

Ah, the good ol’ days of mediocrity.

Welcome to the Age of Anonymity.

After two preseason games of having to look at a roster after every other play to identify a familiar number but unknown name, I wonder how long it will be before we connect to these Texans.

Thanks to a marketing agreement, the Rockets will wear a Credit Karma

Money patch on their jerseys next season.

If there is a company out there called “Who dis?” it should sign such a deal with the Texans.

A conservative guess is no more than six of the 53 players on the Texans’ roster when final cuts are made Tuesday will be with the team three years from now.

That is how fluid this situation is.

(In this case, fluid is defined as “not settled or stable,” as opposed to “smoothly elegant or graceful.”)

The defending Super Bowl champion Tampa Bay Buccaneers will be in town for a preseason game Saturday. You are likely to see more Tom Brady jerseys in the stands than those of anyone on the Texans’ roster.

Aside from Deshaun Watson, that is. The player with whom the team doesn’t want to be associated.

Still, the Texans Team Shop offers more jerseys of Watson than any other player, despite his nonplaying status. And jerseys of Watt and the retired Vince Wilfork, who was with the Texans for only two seasons, are more prominent on the website than those of any current defensive player.

Whose Texans jersey are you rolling dice on longterm?

Starting quarterback Tyrod Taylor, who is a standup guy and heck of a leader, but has been on four teams in five years and started just four games the past three seasons?

Backup quarterback Davis Mills, a rookie thirdround draft pick who started six games at Stanford in 2019 and five games last year?

Or one of the players none of your friends has ever heard of ?

According to NFLPA numbers, Watson was No. 43 in the NFL last year in merchandise sales. This despite having a marvelous season and being one the NFL’s most marketable young stars.

Yes, the Texans hurt his brand, which was surely part of his reasoning for demanding a trade. Of course, he then obliterated his marketability with a slew of ill-advised off-thefield decisions that resulted in almost two dozen civil lawsuits.

Do note: Jersey sales are not the be-all, end-all. I mean, Tim Tebow’s Jacksonville Jaguars jersey in teal was the NFL’s No. 1 seller in May. His jersey in black was No. 2.

Tebow made it through one preseason game before getting cut, bless his heart.

Still, I imagine the regret for those who made that nonsensical purchase won’t compare to that of people who purchase steel blue uniform tops in 2021.

Would you rather walk around wearing a spiffy Jaguars jersey with Tebow on the back or a Texans jersey with “Insert Name Here” written on it?

I know some of you are thinking, “There is no I in team.” But without some star I’s, said team is not good.

That said, the Texans have played better in the preseason than most expected them to. They look like a well-coached football team.

Having been to couple of their boring practices — aside from curling “workouts,” the NFL offers the least entertaining practices in sports — I’d say David Culley’s Texans are professional, organized and focused.

Newcomers seem eager to please, returning players appreciative of the less toxic atmosphere.

The offense isn’t flashy and won’t scare anyone on paper, but the defense seems drastically improved.

No superstars, just competent players.

“I mean, this team just feels more fundamentally sound and solid across the board,” fourth-year safety Justin Reid said. “The details feel a little bit more crisp.”

Reid said working under new defensive coordinator Lovie Smith brings a “higher level of accountability” than he saw before.

Of course, winning is more important than jersey sales.

The most repeated question on local sports talk this week was “Will the Texans win more games in the preseason than in the regular season?”

They are playing just three exhibition games this year.

That is almost as sad as the great J.J. Watt’s jersey being sold for $9.