Thumbs up, down
Jan. 6 hubris; Jagger does Dallas, but JFK Jr. does not; Astroworld Festival raises spirits.
White privilege can get a person far in this country, but, as we saw this week, there are certain rules to playing that card. Rule No. 1: never acknowledge that the card actually exists. Apparently, North Texas real estate broker Jenna Ryan didn’t get the memo when she tweeted a couple of months after joining the Jan. 6 pro-Trump insurrection: “Sorry I have blonde hair white skin a great job a great future and I’m not going to jail. … I did nothing wrong.” The 50-yearold might well have escaped jail time given her offenses were relatively minor — she exited the Capitol building promptly because she couldn’t handle the tear gas and apparently didn’t act on her words in a recording made soon after declaring she was “going to war.” But a federal judge in D.C. found her hubris and her lack of remorse distasteful, and cited the notoriety she’d gained as “one of the faces” of the shameful riot in sentencing her to 60 days behind bars. She lamented on Twitter that PayPal and other payment gateways are thwarting her attempts to raise money for her legal defense. But we’re pretty sure she’ll find a way. After all, she’s still got her looks. Even after all the Jan. 6 rioters are
prosecuted, there will still be true believers clinging to the latest QAnon premonitions and praying for Trump’s God gene to restore him to his rightful throne as King of Kings in the Oval Office. Several hundred of them gathered this week in Dallas’ mecca of American political conspiracy theories, Dealey Plaza, where President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in 1963. The QAnon disciples were said to have congregated in the belief that Kennedy’s son, JFK Jr., who was killed in a plane crash in 1999, would emerge after decades in mythical hiding. At this point, the QAnon soap opera is so convoluted even Susan Lucci couldn’t make it believable but we’re pretty sure it ends the same way as all the other episodes (spoiler alert!) — with Trump’s victory. When JFK Jr. did not appear, some vowed to return to the Grassy Knoll to keep watch. Others expected the next revelation to come at a far likelier place, where supernatural phenomena such as immortality and the fountain of youth are routinely made flesh: a Rolling Stones concert.
Alas, Stones lead singer Mick Jagger didn’t have time for the conspiracy crowd as he prepared for his Dallas show this week. If he wants to fan the flames of delirium, all he has to do is show up unannounced at a local museum on a sleepy Monday and ask for a look-see around. Jennifer Monet Cowley, a local artist and fashion designer, told WFAA she was at the African American Museum of Dallas when a gentleman with a British accent, wiry frame and perfect mess of rock star hair asked whether the museum was closed. It was, but only for mere mortals. After first doubting whether it could really be him, Cowley said she asked the tourist’s name. “He said ‘Mick’ and I lost it,” Crowley said. “I became that person that I did not want to be. I let out a high-pitched squeal and jumped straight up in the air.” She later told 78-year-old Sir Mick that she’d design a custom shirt for him. In return, Jagger gifted her two VIP tickets to Tuesday’s concert and a lasting memory that’ll get more replays at family gatherings than, say, Mariah Carey in December.
Or, at this point, should we should say Carey in November, too? Every year, Christmas seems to creep earlier into fall, with festive lights adorning lawns and holiday junkies itching to turn up the season’s charttopping anthem — her “All I Want For Christmas Is You” — before the last trickor-treaters have dispersed. But one Dallas bar, the iconic Stoneleigh P, made headlines recently for an all-caps jukebox sign warning patrons that anyone playing the song before Dec. 1 would hear it “skipped” by staff, and even after Dec. 1, “the song is only allowed one time a night.” A picture of the sign went viral on social media, and some got their tinsel in a tangle over the perceived slight of the Queen of Christmas. The uproar confused bar management since the sign was posted years ago, apparently in a nod to the mental health of staff who must endure endless loops of
familiar favorites. But Carey seemed to take it in stride. When someone on Twitter asked if the bar’s stance was part of the long-bemoaned “war on Christmas,” Carey posted an image of herself clad in battlefield attire. The Stoneleigh P’s manager, Laura Garrison, insists she has nothing against Carey and even vowed to lift the bar’s policy if Carey ever stopped in for a drink. A round of eggnog and infinite octaves of holiday bliss — coming up!
Back in Houston, we have our own reasons to celebrate. No, sniff, sniff, those don’t include another World Series trophy. We applaud the Astros on a thrilling season but we speak of rapper Travis Scott, who is championing Houston with the return of his Astroworld Festival, which continues Saturday at NRG Park. We’re grateful to Houston’s hometown star for introducing bygone memories of the Astros-themed amusement park to a younger generation, and summoning the spirits of another iconic Houston destination, the Astrodome, that aging hunk of concrete and steel that our city once trumpeted as the “Eighth Wonder of the World” and now shamefully stuck in bureaucratic purgatory. If only Scott could use his influence to persuade Harris County commissioners that the structure really does have historic value, tourism cache and is worthy of investment! This week, though, Scott had other important priorities: unveiling an outdoor basketball court in Sunnyside named for his Cactus Jack nonprofit and Nike Jordan brand, and a visit to Young Elementary School to highlight the Cactus Jack Gardens initiative that teaches Houston ISD students about agriculture, nutrition and entrepreneurship. In a word, simply wonderful.