Thumbs: Lawmaker’s sequin-gate
Sticks and stones may break your bones. But sequins will come back to haunt you. At least they did for state Rep. Nate Schatzline, a Fort Worth Republican who has railed against the harmful influence of drag shows on America’s youth but found himself in an odd predicament this week when an old video surfaced of him frolicking gleefully with costumed friends in a black sequined dress and a shiny red mask. Werk! Some cried hypocrisy — kind of like the Go Go Boot calling the kimono “Queen.” “Y’all really going crazy over me wearing a dress as a joke back in school for a theatre project?” the lawmaker tweeted in response. “Yah, that’s not a sexually explicit drag show… lol y’all will twist ANYTHING.” Apparently, so can Schatzline, who filed a bill this session that defines any kind of venue showing drag as a sexually oriented business subject to all kinds of restrictions and taxes. Now that’s twisted.
The nation has mercifully avoided any fiery collisions after a few close calls on U.S. airport runways recently. Here in Houston — inside the airport, at least — it’s a different story. No one’s been physically injured, as far as we know, but feelings certainly have, as a fiery collision of egos has turned the airport contract bidding process into a food fight. First came CEO Chris Pappas sparring with Mayor Sylvester Turner over a tortured process that seeks to boot his iconic Pappas Restaurants brand out of Hobby Airport for the first time in 20 years. Turner says the competitive process was legit and told the CEO: “If you don’t compete and win, Chris, you are not entitled to your seat.” D’oh! Or should we say Deaux? Then came the Breakfast Klub’s Marcus Davis, seeking at least $1 million in damages in a lawsuit against prominent City Hall consultant Cindy Clifford for allegedly fraudulently inducing his company to join a contract at Bush Intercontinental Airport only to partly squeeze him out after she won it. Clifford’s attorney called the lawsuit a “shakedown.” Who knew airport food politics could get so heated? Clifford, apparently. She was sued in 2020 after three of her partners in another airport contract — former Houston Rocket Clyde Drexler, Rafael Acosta and Ricardo Castaneda — accused her of cheating them, and settled last year. Can we hope that any of this will lead to a reasonably priced pre-flight meal at our chosen airport eatery? When waffles grow wings. Oh, wait.
Somebody at Netflix ought to produce a special series about Republican Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton. For seven years, while serving as the state’s top law enforcement officer, Paxton has delayed going to trial for securities fraud with legal motions for this or that. Those dull tactics have given way to more panache.
Instead of giving sworn testimony during the 2022 election season, Paxton dodged depositions by citing unresolvable “scheduling conflicts.” The Dallas Morning News reports he was busy romping through Europe in July with stops in Rome and Lithakia, a Greek village on the Ionian Sea, adding in a little island hopping over to St. Julian’s, a quaint Maltese town with Mediterranean beaches, racking up a mere $78,000 in costs to taxpayers for his security detail. At least U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz had the decency of flying solo to nearby Cancun during Winter Storm Uri.
And you thought the federal tax code was overbearing, tedious and judgy. A new bill by state Rep. Bryan Slaton aims to turn the Texas tax code into a confessional. If you’ve got kids and want a generous property tax break for them, it’s your lucky day — but only if you can make it through the morality gauntlet that the Royse City Republican has built into the proposed measure. You have to have four kids to qualify for a 40 percent cut and you pay no property taxes at all if you’ve got 10 kids. Which should be no problem at all, given Texas’ abstinence-heavy, completely voluntary sex ed curriculum. A married couple without kids can qualify but — they must be a man and a woman and they can never have been divorced. Slaton says he’s just trying to help families, which can be the backbone of our society as long as they have a little financial support. We heartily agree. But can we just start with health insurance and funding schools adequately?