Julia Dumped AFTER 14 YEARS
Julia Roberts’ marriage crumbles after she and husband Danny Moder have the fight to end all fights
They were at it — again. Desperate to put some space between himself and wife Julia Roberts after what a family friend describes as “another one of their huge blowups,” in December Danny Moder headed across the street from his family’s sprawling Malibu compound to a smaller home they’d bought a year ago that was originally meant to house visiting friends and family. After Danny cooled down and some time had passed, he made a life-changing decision that signaled the beginning of the end. “Several weeks later, in early January, he told Julia that he was not coming home because he finally felt free and at peace,” the family friend tells In Touch. “The crushing news set Julia off, and the couple had their worst fight ever.”
Danny had had enough. “He decided having an acrimonious marriage just wasn’t worth it any longer,” the family friend tells In Touch exclusively, adding that the couple, who married in 2002, had been fighting for months over everything from her control issues and complaints that he’s never around to his insecurities and how to raise their three kids, twins Phinnaeus and Hazel, 12, and Henry, 9. So after more than 15 years of being with the woman once known as America’s Sweetheart, “Danny said he was letting go. He dumped her. Julia thought it would blow over just like it always did and was devastated when he told her he wasn’t coming back. Now it’s become a cold war between them, with Danny hunkered down across the street.”
He’s turning the modest property into a veritable playground for himself and the kids. The 1,770-squarefoot 1950s ranch-style residence in Malibu’s Point Dume neighborhood has been renovated and was recently enhanced with a brand-new outdoor skate park (see left). “Danny’s made it into a fun place for the kids to visit, and it’s where he has friends come to ride BMX bikes and skateboards,” says the family friend. “The kids just think it’s ‘Dad’s hangout.’” But to Danny and
“Danny dumped Julia after staying for an extended period of time at the house they own across the street,” says a family friend. The skate park (left) is a new addition.
Julia it’s so much more. “Danny would often retreat there when things got tense between him and Julia,” adds the family friend. “The recent erecting of the skate park really illustrates where Danny’s priorities are these days.”
The relationship has been on a downward slide for at least two years. Julia and Danny’s home life has disintegrated into a series of unwinnable battles over several issues, with her lust for control — and his desire to be the man of the house — fueling much of the drama. “Julia just never learned how to let someone else be in charge, and Danny has never been able to accept that,” says the family friend. “Especially since Julia earns so much more money than him.” Though Danny, 48, is a well-respected cameraman and cinematographer, he’s not exactly earning tens of millions of dollars and bringing home big awards like his
Oscar-winner wife, 49. “He feels like he isn’t needed to support the family, and he’s felt demoralized over never being able to be the provider.”
He’s tried to be seen as more than Mr. Julia Roberts, often working on projects that don’t involve his wife. “But Julia didn’t like him taking jobs that would take him away from home for any length of time. She also didn’t like him going on surf trips with his buddies,” explains the family friend. “She feared he might get a taste of freedom and realize life was better that way. And that’s exactly what happened.” Their different parenting
Danny and Julia’s relationship has been falling apart for the past few years”
— A FAMILY FRIEND
styles have also caused friction. “They’ve been at complete odds when it comes to raising the kids, with Julia setting more boundaries than Danny does.”
Now they have separate lives and separate friends. “Julia has a group of pals in Malibu that she meditates, practices yoga and cooks vegan food with. She’s currently working on a macrobiotic cookbook with them,” says the family friend. “Meanwhile, Danny plays soccer coach and surfs and rides BMX bikes with his sons, their friends and their fathers. When he’s not away on a job, he’s often at the house across the street from the main home. He has a workshop, office and all his surfboards, bikes and sporting goods at the smaller house.”
Divorce is now a very real option. “The only reason Danny has stuck out the strained relationship this long is because of the kids,” says the family friend. “He knows that with Julia’s money, she can get the best attorney possible for a divorce, and he’s frightened that she’d get primary custody and he’d be stuck being an every-other-weekend dad.” While Danny’s afraid of losing the kids, Julia’s scared she’d be forced to hand over a big chunk of her $250 million fortune. “The one thing Julia fears more than anything when it comes to divorce is that California is a no-fault state,” adds the family friend. “Danny could leave her and take half her money with him.”
But if Julia has her way, they’ll never divorce. She and Danny still love each other and have moments of tenderness together. They took a family trip for the Jan. 21 Women’s March in Washington, D.C., and were spotted having dinner together the night before. “Despite everything that’s happened, she’s praying that they can somehow work things out,” says the family friend. The couple’s 15th wedding anniversary is in July, and no one knows if they’ll make it that far. “It’s sad,” adds the family friend. “But Julia doesn’t really want it to end.” ◼