LIFE’S BIG questions!
J-14 HAS THE ANSWERS TO YOUR MOST BURNING QUESTIONS AND PERSONAL DILEMMAS!
My mom gives me no freedom!
Q: My mom says I am too young for a boyfriend or social media. How do I tell her that I need freedom to make my own mistakes? — Ariel, 13 A: Hey Ariel! The honest answer here that there’s no way for you to tell your mom that you’re deserving of freedom. The good news is that you can show her! As you get older and go from middle school to high school, your responsibilities begin to change. Instead of having your mom wake you up for school and help you with homework or assist you in making you lunch and washing your clothes, those responsibilities will fall on your shoulders. The best thing you can do is show her that you can handle your new responsibilities like a pro. As you do, she’ll see that you’re growing up and she’ll allow you some room to make decisions for yourself!
I have a crush on a close
friend!
Q:
I’m crushing on my friend and I’m not sure what to do! I don’t know if they like me back or not. What should I do? — Ray, 15
A: Ray, crushing on a friend is not an easy situation, but you can’t help who you like! We think that holding back your feelings is always harder than expressing them, so our advice is to tell your friend how you feel. Ask them if they have any feelings for you. Just know that this definitely comes with some risks. For one, if they don’t like you, that rejection is sure to hurt. Also, things can get awkward if you’re not on the same page. If the feelings are mutual, there’s a chance that you date and then break up, which could put a strain on the friendship. So, you’re probably wondering why we still think expressing your feelings is the right move. Well, if you never tell them how you feel, you’ll go the rest of your life wondering what could have been! You’ll have this secret looming over your friendship and eventually, that’ll impact your relationship.
Might as well give things a shot, right? Good luck!
My crush is sending mixed messages!
Q: I recently told my crush that I liked him and he said he wanted to hang out with me! Of course, I was excited and nervous, but the next day he ignored me when I walked by him. I see him looking at me, but he hasn’t said anything. Was I wrong to tell him how I feel? — Aliyah, 13
This is a sticky situation, Aliyah, and we’re sorry you’re going through it. It A:
sounds to us like your crush may be a little confused about his own feelings. We think the best thing you can do is approach him when he’s by himself and ask if he still wants to hang out. If he says yes, that’s great! If he says no, that stinks, but at least you’ll no longer need to wonder what he’s thinking. If his answer is vague, somewhere in the middle of yes and no or he flat-out avoids answering you, we suggest moving on and letting him know you’re not going to wait for an answer. Because, if we’re honest, someone who is ready to date wouldn’t hesitate in saying yes to a great girl like you. It’ll be hard to walk away after putting yourself out there and admitting you had a crush, but, trust us, forget about him and move on to someone who is as into you as you are into them!
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! Insta on
Q It doesnt matter that i know people edit their photos and ise filters. I still feel ugly when I look at other girls on social media. Help!
A
We cannot emphasis the power of the unfollow button enough! We all have different things that trigger our insecurities. The power is in your hands (literally!) to identify those triggers and unfollow the accounts that set them off. Maybe you’re envious of girls who constantly post about their picture-perfect relationships. Maybe you feel insecure when you see influencers posting their #sponsored vacations on the beach. Whatever it is, unfollow all of those accounts, even if you like the person IRL. It’ll help keep comparisons at bay. Instead, focus on curating a feed of your interests, whether that’s Reels of puppies falling asleep, throwback One Direction photos or nail art tutorials. The more your Instagram feels like it’s catering to you, the less you’ll feel inundated with images that play at your insecurities!
My friends make fun of me for liking
someone!
Q: All of my friend tease me about liking this boy, even though they say he likes me, too. What is going on? It hurts my feelings coming from my friends! — Brooklyn, 13
A: Ugh, it’s frustrating to have friends who don’t support you, Brooklyn.
We sense that your friends may be a bit jealous that you’ve met someone you really like. Jealousy amongst a friend group is normal, especially when you’re all used to just hanging out together, but it doesn’t justify teasing. Have you told them how you feel yet? We think letting them know that their teasing hurts your feelings is the best place to start. Good friends will get the hint and ease up on their mean behavior. If they don’t, the best move for your mental health may be taking a little break from the group.