Readers offer their stories and advice

DEAR READERS >> Often, readers reply to dilemmas posed in my column in ways that are helpful, useful, and inspiring. Today’s column is devoted to some of these replies.

DEAR AMY >> Responding to questions about DNA disclosures, my wife found out that her father was not her biological parent when she had her DNA analyzed by a family historical research company. It came as quite a shock. Both her mother and father have been dead for some time.

My wife has been more hurt from finding out this way, as opposed to being told by her mother.

Her two brothers also took DNA tests and they all discovered that her older brother was also fathered by another man.

Your advice to inform people about DNA findings is solid.

— Embracing Answers

DEAR EMBRACING >> DNA discoveries are forcing many families to re-imagine their histories.

DEAR AMY >> “Selfish” wondered when it might be too late to send or receive a letter of condolence after a death in the family.

When our youngest son was killed five weeks before his 19th birthday, we received hundreds of notes and sympathy cards.

While we greatly appreciated all of the condolences we received at the time, the note we got six months later was the one that stood out. We felt extra supported to know that someone else remembered that while the world moved on, our life had been turned upside down and that we continued to be devastated.

— Supported

DEAR SUPPORTED >> I hope your testimony will inspire people to reach out to those who grieve — no matter how much time has passed.