American uncle worries about footing the bill

DEAR AMY >> Some of my family members are going to have a mini family reunion in Paris in a few months — the city where my brother lives.

My brother's son, wife and their two young children will be flying to Paris from Istanbul, and I will be flying in from the USA.

My nephew's family and I will be staying at the same hotel.

Several times my brother has mentioned that his son and family are coming to Paris “especially to see the uncle from America.”

So, in light of those repeated comments, do you think it would be necessary or rather the right thing to do for me to pay for my nephew and family's hotel bill during their week's visit in Paris?

And yes, I can afford to pay — but do I need to?

— Dan in LA

DEAR DAN >> Thank you for asking a question that will be met by a universal sigh: “What a nice problem to have.”

Your nephew and family are traveling for a family reunion, which will include his father (grandparent to the children). Presumably these family members have spent time together previously.

I infer that your nephew and his wife have not spent much (if any) time with you and that their children have possibly never met you.

You can imagine their excitement and curiosity about meeting their American uncle.

Your brother is passing along this family's excitement, not asking for you to foot their bill or implying that you should.

I don't read anything in your narrative that should lead you down this path, but if they are in need or you want to be generous in this way, then paying for their hotel bill would be a very kind thing to do.

Otherwise, I hope you will bring some small gifts from Los Angeles, perhaps take them to lunch or to a museum in Paris, and — if you all hit it off — you could invite them to visit you in your home, and foot the bill when you do.

DEAR AMY >> “Pondering Papa” asked about unmarried couples sleeping together while visiting home.

Decades ago, when my live-in boyfriend and I visited his parents, his mother stated that while she knew that we were living together and sleeping together, in her house we would not: “My house, my rules.”

Several years later when they visited us, I said that I had put them in separate rooms because now it was “My house .... My rules.”

We all laughed for many years about that. I still miss them!

DEAR GRATEFUL >> Having a sense of humor definitely helps.