Time to end emailing chronic forwarder

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A relative of mine has developed a habit of forwarding personal emails to anyone he feels might be interested in the updates offered.

I haven’t seen any that include secrets, but receiving emails that are not addressed to me and don’t include a request that he forward them to me makes me very uncomfortable.

I also feel fairly certain he must be forwarding emails I send him to other people. How can I politely but firmly ask that he keep my emails to himself and stop forwarding those of others to me?

GENTLE READER: Start using the telephone instead. If this is not an option, Miss Manners suggests that the next time your relative forwards you someone else’s email, you return it, saying, “Oh dear. I am afraid you must have hit ‘forward’ instead of ‘reply,’ and that this was not intended for me.”

If he insists that it was, you could tell him firmly, but politely, that when you write to him, you are doing so under the auspices of keeping it between you — and that you would hate to have to start censoring yourself. The fear of losing out on juicy gossip might curb this man’s impulse to continue spreading it.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We had our friends and their young son come visit us from out of state. We, too, have a young child, and had a great time hanging with them.

We’ve recently finished a six-month renovation on our home and that, coupled with the fact that we’re in general a very clean family, led me to do some light cleaning when I had downtime during their stay. Their son was messy, as I completely understand all kids are — spitting up on the floor, dropping food, putting remote controls in his mouth, etc.

While his parents tried to track him down and clean where they could, I thought it would be seen as helpful that I would help clean up around them so they could keep their son happy and also relax if possible. I’d do things like wiping down the counter or quickly vacuuming food crumbs.

Do you think this was inappropriate behavior — that I should’ve waited to let them clean, or done it when they left a couple days later? I hope I didn’t come off as rude. What are your thoughts?

GENTLE READER: That while your intentions may be good, your actions are likely coming across as at least brusque, if not rude.

Submit your etiquette questions to Miss Manners at dearmissmanners@gmail. com.