Some rules can be bent for solo diners

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Eating alone 95 percent of the time, I have time to ponder such problems as:

1. Is it OK to double-dip my chips in the salsa or queso at a Mexican restaurant, since my track record over 40 years shows that I will not be joined by anyone?

2. Am I breaking a rule of etiquette to maneuver my refried beans down to the rice side of the plate and mix them? I like to eat them mixed.

3. Our local Chinese buffet always offers vegetable lo mein. It also always has a huge slab of roast beef or pork. Am I out of order to slice off my portion of meat and, then, back at the table, cut it up and create a meat lo mein dish? I know you’re supposed to cut your meat bite-by-bite as you eat it, but this seems to be a logical exception.

I don’t see how I can turn these problems around to shift the blame elsewhere. But I’m truly seeking information. I can mend my ways if need be.

GENTLE READER: When eating alone in public, most of the standard etiquette rules still apply, but not all. You might bear in mind that others, including the waitstaff, may observe you inadvertently.

However, you are not asking to lick your plate. If it is your own private condiment dish, then you may “double-dip.” If you can subtly mix your rice and beans, then do so. You may cut your lo mein meat.

Miss Manners hopes that your reward for recognizing that being in public is not the same as being alone will arrive in the form of company at future meals.

DEAR MISS MANNERS:

I have been interested in design since I was young. I have honed my style and design acumen through observation, study and travel, and I use my home to express that style.

I enjoy hosting friends and family, during which I am often asked about a particular object. I appreciate the curiosity and am happy to supply any information I can.

What I am not comfortable with is when I am asked about the price of said object. I try to demur and say “I don’t recall” or “Too much!” but I have been pressed further more than once.

I’ve even gone as far as to give the contact name of a dealer, but I know some people are just being nosy. I should say that some items I’ve found at tag sales, while others are pricey antiques. What would Miss Manners suggest?

GENTLE READER: “Even if I could recall the cost, I am afraid that it is between me and my tax attorney. But thank you for your interest.”

Submit your etiquette questions to Miss Manners at dearmissmanners@gmail. com.