Take personal number off business card

DEAR MISS MANNERS: At my company, we have our personal cellphone numbers on our business cards, which is fine.

However, I think it should be an unwritten rule that business acquaintances should only use that number when there’s a time-sensitive issue and they can’t reach me at the office.

The vast majority of people who have my card do treat it that way. However, a few call my cell number freely for reasons that aren’t urgent.

To me, it’s like giving a neighbor an emergency key to your house. You want them to have it, but you don’t want them to drop in for a midnight snack.

Is there a polite way to let people know that for ordinary business, they should call me at the office?

GENTLE READER: With the lines blurred between business and social situations and their respective calling cards (social cards being virtually nonexistent), callers have no choice but to use the number they are offered.

Miss Manners recommends that you create new business cards with only your office phone number listed. Then, if you find yourself with clients who will need more direct access, you may invite them to use your mobile telephone number and scribble it in by hand.

A conspiratorial “I only do this for clients I trust with my personal information” can be added, if you can muster it up without sounding creepy.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When friends or family cancel after accepting an invitation, who bears the burden of rescheduling?

A friend canceled plans for lunch the morning of the lunch. A family we know canceled a long-planned day trip because an event their child had to attend came up. Last summer, my brother and his family canceled a holiday-weekend visit to our home — the day before we expected them — because pet-care plans fell through.

I completely understand that life happens, but none of these people suggested an alternative plan, and none have reached out to reschedule since then.

I have always thought the burden of rescheduling lies with the canceling party. I also question whether it’s worth reinviting them to new events; it’s fair to conclude they are signaling a lack of interest, and I don’t want to put people in the position of scrambling to politely decline. How would you proceed at this point?

GENTLE READER: You may stop issuing invitations to ungracious friends. To family, you may only stop issuing them with enthusiasm.

Submit your etiquette questions to Miss Manners at dearmissmanners@gmail. com.