Many couples sleep in separate rooms
DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married for 45 years. When she moved out of our bedroom, I thought she didn’t love me anymore. Then I realized that our sleeping habits have changed.
She snores, and I toss and turn. She needs the room dark, while I like a night light. I wasn’t around when my parents got old, so I didn’t realize our sleeping arrangement was going to change. We still love each other but sleep in different rooms. Is this normal? — Wondering in California
DEAR WONDERING: While I would have suggested your wife try various kinds of sleep masks, your new arrangement is not an indication that there is trouble in your relationship. Many couples do this. So stop worrying and be glad you have a solution that works.
DEAR ABBY: My brother and sister-in-law own a golden retriever. “Cookie” is their baby. I live in a place where I can’t have pets, plus I don’t have a car. I’m disabled, so it’s harder for me to get around.
I would love for my brother and sister-in-law to visit me for a couple of days. My brother does visit, but only for about an hour because they refuse to put Cookie in a kennel.
What should I say to him without causing him to get mad at me? I feel he’s putting that dog first, before his own sister. — Doggone It in Michigan
DEAR DOGGONE IT:
Your brother and sister-inlaw’s goldie is also a member of their family. Demanding they put Cookie in a kennel is tantamount to telling them they must put their child in foster care for the duration of their visit.
If your brother is willing to visit with you, he IS showing his love for you. Can you suggest he arrange for a neighbor to look after Cookie for two days?
DEAR ABBY: The last of our children has graduated and left the nest. My wife and I are starting to go through years of boxes. In the process, we have discovered several checks written to us that we never cashed — mostly for Girl Scout cookies or other fundraising items and birthday gifts for the kids.
The checks are mostly more than 15 years old, but they add up to around $300. Would it be proper to ask the check writers to reissue their checks so long after they were written? — Questioning in Pennsylvania
DEAR QUESTIONING:
To ask that the checks be rewritten after 15 years would be an imposition and likely not well received. Furthermore, if they were intended for your children for birthdays, Christmas, graduations, etc., any replacement checks should be made out to them.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www. Dearabby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.