Son-in-law still drives after seizures
DEAR ABBY: My sonin-law was diagnosed with epilepsy 25 years ago. He typically has two or three seizures a year. He has seen a neurologist on and off over the years, but he has not been to the doctor for his medications in several years. He works in the medical field and gets his meds from the doctors he works with.
He recently had a seizure after dropping one of his children off at an appointment. Fortunately, the child wasn’t in the car when he wrecked it. My question is, how involved should I be? Should I confront him?
Did I mention he refuses to stop driving? I’m extremely concerned about the well-being of my daughter and four grandchildren and the lives of others on the roads who could be injured or killed as a result of his actions. Do I have a right to be involved? — Frightened in the South
DEAR FRIGHTENED:
Your son-in-law should not be taking medications for his epilepsy from doctors who are not intimately involved with his care. If the accident didn’t serve as a wakeup call to talk to his doctor, it should have.
Consider contacting your auto insurance company and asking what can be done about an epileptic motorist who is prone to seizures several times a year while still driving. If you can’t find guidance there, the state police where your son-inlaw lives might be interested in what you have to say. The only thing you should NOT do is stay silent.
DEAR ABBY: Over the last several years I have learned the value of counseling, which helped me deal with years of undiagnosed depression. It has been a wonderful and life-changing experience.
One of my relatives has mentioned several times that she has a very strained relationship with her mom.
On Mother’s Day, I saw several social media posts from people celebrating their mothers. My relative posted something along the lines of, “My goal in life is to be a better mother than mine was” and some other things that demonstrated her disdain for her mother.
When I saw the post, my heart ached for her mom, but my heart ached for my relative even more. How should I approach this? — Helping Out in Idaho
DEAR HELPING: Approach it by telling your relative you saw her post and were struck by the pain she must be feeling to have put something like that online for all the world to see. Explain about the baggage that therapy helped you to overcome in your own life and what a difference it has made for you. Then offer her your therapist’s phone number.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www. Dearabby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.