Lodi News-Sentinel

Ambitious proofreade­r may need career talk

- ANNIE LANE https://suicidepre­ventionlif­eline.org/help-someone-else. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

Dear Annie: I work as an editor at a publishing company. It has been difficult to find capable proofreade­rs. I’ve had one working with me for the past few years who proved herself to be capable. She showed great attention to detail and would make occasional suggestion­s to books that added value. In the past few months, she has grown frustrated that she hasn’t advanced to editor and has let her proofreadi­ng responsibi­lities slip. I’ve noticed obvious errors that she’s missed. More importantl­y, she has become more vocal about making story suggestion­s and has gone behind my back to make these in an attempt to prove herself. I am supportive of her advancing, but at the appropriat­e timing, which is dictated by the company and our needs, not based on her desired timing. Do you have any advice on how I might approach her and motivate her? — Frustrated Editor

Dear Editor: Trust takes years to earn and seconds to lose. Careers are built over a long period of continued success and having a positive attitude, and a change in course can destabiliz­e everything a person has worked for.

I recommend taking this proofreade­r out of the office for lunch, coffee or a walk and asking her about her career ambitions, both short-term and long-term. Taking her out of the office will make it less formal, and you will have more success helping her plot a course to achieving these ambitions in a realistic time frame. Some mentorship and guidance should go a long way toward creating a grateful and loyal person and a successful career path.

Dear Annie: I am sending this out to anyone considerin­g suicide. Please reconsider what you are thinking. My father killed himself in 1978. I still think about the many what-ifs. What if I had called? What if I had gone to see him? I think of my dad often and will always wonder whether I could have done more to let him know how much I loved him. Don’t do this to the ones you leave behind. I know you probably think they would be better off without you, but that is not true. The guilt we carry is awful. — Daughter

Dear Daughter: I am so incredibly sorry for the loss of your father. Please do not blame yourself for what happened.

Though I understand you mean well and speak from the heart when you implore suicidal people not to go through with it because of what it would do to their loved ones, I want to note that this style of appeal can heap guilt onto suicidal people when they’re already depressed beyond management. To anyone reading this right now who is considerin­g suicide, please seek help immediatel­y. Dial 911 or call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-799-4889. Counselors are waiting to listen. You do not need to be considerin­g suicide to call the hotline; if you’re struggling with depression, give it a call, too.

To anyone worried a loved one may be considerin­g selfharm, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline or visit

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